Kitty
by Isilithix
Summary: Nii Yugito, deadly assassin of Kumogakure and Jinchuriki of the Nibi. Yugito sometimes has times where she acts like a cat. What happens when an 8 year old Naruto finds her acting like a cat and makes her his pet? Or, tries to...
1. Chapter 1

Kitty

Sarutobi stared at the blonde boy in front of him in a state of shock and awe. This wasn't the first time he had been amazed by the young Uzumaki boy; and he was sure, that it wasn't going to be the last time either.

"Um…N-Naruto-Kun…" he tried to start as he stared at the boy's companion, who, like the boy though several years older than the boy; watching her carefully. "Who…who is this new friend you have here?"

The blonde boy, no more than eight or nine years old; looked from the Old Man in front of him and quirked his head to the left in a state of confusion. He could tell, from years of being lied to by others, that the Old Man wasn't exactly happy about his new friend. Why? He didn't know. He looked at his new friend and a small smile formed on his tanned face. He liked his new friend.

His new friend was nice and she played with him. Why she insisted on licking the top of his head and then preen his hair with her hands…he didn't know, but still; she was nice. And pretty.

Sarutobi looked at the boy's new friend with mixed emotions. Confusion, worry and fear. The older girl, no; young woman who Naruto had seemed to made friends with was a shinobi of Kumogakure, and therefore, an enemy of Konoha…and yet; she was much more. He knew, through one of his old students, that this young woman was none other than Nii Yugito…the dreaded Jinchuriki of the demon cat, Nibi.

He had heard tales of her ferocious battles and her expertise in stealth and infiltration. She may act like she was mute, but he knew, that she was battle hardened and a professional killer. Naruto, on the other hand, didn't…or, didn't care. Since she showed up, at least, had been reported by the Anbu two days ago, Naruto; a boy who up until last week walked around with a cloud of anger and hate that seemed to be almost palpable; had been a bundle of smiles and a basket of giggles. Like a three year old who was being tickled.

"I don't know Jiji." Naruto admitted. "But she's nice and pretty…" a small hint of blush lit the boy's cheeks as he looked at the blonde woman next to him, who was busy glaring lazily at Sarutobi, watching; just in case he made a move against the boy. _'Just like a mother hen…'_ Sarutobi mused. _'Or better yet, a mother cat…'_ "And she plays with me…" Sarutobi looked at Naruto, who had reached out a small arm, small compared to an adult anyways; and scratched the top of the assassin's head, who, instead of pulling away; seemed to boy her head and meet the outstretched hand and brush her head under the boy's hand…

'_Exactly like a cat…'_ Sarutobi mused, a small bit of perverted blush came to his face as he watched in fascination. Suddenly, the young woman snapped her head up towards him and growled. Again…almost cat like. Sarutobi gulped. When the blush faded from his face, the young woman stopped growling at him and resumed running her head back and forth under Naruto's small hand. And then, like a cat, she began to purr.

"Jiji…" Sarutobi looked down at the boy and bid him to continue. "Can…can I keep her?"

"W-Wha?" Sarutobi said intelligently.

"I promise to take care of her, and feed her and water her and-and-and walk her!" the boy shot of promises that normal little boys and girls asked their parents when they wanted a puppy or kitten from the pet shop or pound.

"Wha?" Sarutobi asked again…

"Please?" Naruto pleaded, earning a small chuckle from the three Anbu guards hidden in the room, though the chuckles didn't seem to make the young assassin from Kumo hostile…she was in her own little world. In the palm of Naruto's hand. Literally. "PLEASE?" the blonde boy almost shouted.

"I-I uh…We'll you see Naruto-Kun," Sarutobi tried to explain the situation. "She isn't a shinobi of the Leaf, and as such, she needs to go…uh…go home." He tried to smile, hoping that Naruto didn't know where foreign shinobi went to when they invaded Konoha.

"But I want to keep her!" the boy nearly shouted, causing the young blonde woman to stop rubbing her head under the boy's hand…and instead, turned to licking the side of his face and his hair…again, much like a cat… He didn't know why she was doing such things, but it looked like she was trying to calm Naruto down. _"Please!"_ Oh no, he was begging now. Not good. If there was anything worse than puppy dog eyes, it was kit eyes…and Naruto used them when he wanted something…and he usually got what he wanted…at least, when it was directed at him.

"Well…I guess…I guess so." Sarutobi finally caved, earning more snickering from his Anbu and a smile and a cheer from the boy. "But!" Sarutobi intervened quickly. "She has to be a good girl and listen to you…and you have to be responsible for her actions…do you know what that means?"

"No letting her climb on the curtains?" Naruto asked. "And making sure that she uses the litter box?"

"Yes-Wha?" Sarutobi thought about what the boy had just said. Would an assassin, highly trained in the art of…well…assassination, really climb a curtain or use a litter box? No matter how cat like she acted like? He shuddered at the thought. "Um…yes Naruto…that is exactly what it means."

The young boy cheered loudly, earning a wince from the young woman, who had been licking his head seconds earlier. Then, he turned around and swung his little arms around her neck and pulled her into a hug…well, tried to anyways. What resulted from that attempt, was a pile made up of the boy and the young woman. It took all his might not to think bad thoughts. She was straddling him!

"Yay!" the boy cheered oblivious to the mounds of flesh that were resting on his face as he hugged his new friend. "I have a new pet!" the boy cheered loudly. "I'm going to name you Kitty! Okay?!" the young woman's purr intensified greatly and rubbed her cheek on his chin.

"Uh, Naruto!" Sarutobi caught the boy's attention quickly. Just because the young woman acted like a cat, didn't mean that she was; and Naruto needed to learn that quickly…just in case the woman ever regained her sanity… "Humans are not pets…understand?" the little boy nodded slowly. "She can be your friend…but not your' pet…got that?"

"Yup!" the little boy said cheerfully.

"Alright, you two can go along home now…just…be careful, okay?" Sarutobi said. "And Come back soon, Naruto-Kun…Okay?"

"Can I bring Kitty too?" Naruto asked.

"Uh…sure...Kitty, can come." Sarutobi said slowly, hoping that should the young woman ever regain her sanity…she wouldn't harm him for calling her 'Kitty'.

"Yay! Let's go home Kitty!" the boy cheered excitedly as he pushed the young woman off of him, got up on his feet, and charged through the door.

"What's the worse that can happen?" Sarutobi asked himself. "I'm sure I Kumo wants an explanation as to why we have one of their Jinchuriki…that they'd understand…" he said to his hidden Anbu agents.

"_Hokage-Sama,"_ the intercom on his desk crackled moments after his last statement. _"There are three shinobi from Kumo here…they wish to speak with you about an important matter…"_

"Send them in." He answered automatically without realizing what he had heard or said. _'Oh shit…Kami…you really hate me don't you?'_ In return for his question, a short series of thunder rolled over head. Looking out the window, he saw nothing but clear skies for miles…Kami was laughing.

Suddenly, the door to his office swung open, revealing three young shinobi from Kumo.

"Hokage-Sama…" the leader of the group, obviously a chunin leader, greeted, as all three of them bowed respectfully. "We have reason to believe…that we just saw Nii Yugito of Kumogakure leave, accompanying a young boy…in your village…is that right?" at Sarutobi's nod, the young chunin, a young woman herself brought a hand to her face and pinched the bridge of her nose and curse silently. "Not again…"

"Not again?" Sarutobi asked puzzled.

"Sorry Hokage-Sama…its just, that when Nii Yugito is overly frustrated, she starts to act like a cat…for reasons we _both_ know why." The woman stated. "When she acts like a cat, she picks someone and stays with them until…she either becomes calm and collected again…or if she gets a dose of her medicine…"

"So she's mentally unstable then?" Sarutobi asked, hoping that the woman in front of him was lying.

"Yes…unfortunately, which is why we need to bring her back home, to Kumo…providing that you let us…" the woman stated, knowing about the tension between the two villages' being at an all time high thanks to the failed kidnapping of the Hyuuga Heiress four years ago.

"Normally I would let you, Kuoichi-San…but…I just let a little boy, who has no one else in the entire village to care or look out for him 'Take-Care' of her…" Sarutobi said with air quotation marks.

"You mean, she is the property of a little perverted boy?!" one of the young men behind the young woman snarled.

"Little…yes, perverted, no." Sarutobi said with a glare. "In fact, he thinks that she is a cat…based on the uh…name he has given her."

The young chunin leader quirked an eyebrow in question. "Name?"

"Yes…I know of who she is, and I'm not so stupid as to tell a little boy her name…that would cause chaos in the village." Sarutobi said wisely. "So, the boy gave her a new name…Kitty."

"Kitty?" the other young man asked. At Sarutobi's nod, he burst out laughing. "HAHAHAHA! KITTY! IMAGINE, NII YUGITO, FEARED JINCHURIKI OF KUMOGAKURE, BEING CALLED KITTY BY A LITTLE BOY!"

"I see…well…this is…yeah…" the lead chunin stumbled over her words, not sure about what to say or do in this situation. "Well, with your permission…do uh…you think we could try and coax Nii Yugito…back into sanity?"

"Well…you can try…but, I'll have to come with you for safety reasons…" Sarutobi stated slowly.

"We are more than capable to deal with any threat that comes from your genin and civilians Hokage-Sama!" the young man who had called Naruto a pervert spat.

"I'm sure you can." Sarutobi stated with a wave of his right hand. "But, the boy you will be dealing with is…well…he…he tends to…well…let's just say that there is only person who has ever defeated him…"

"But he's like eight years old!" the young man almost shouted. "He can't do anything to harm us!"

"Alright, but don't say I didn't warn you." Sarutobi said as he stood up and made his way towards the door.

--

With the three Kumo-Nin following him, Sarutobi earned more than a few glares and odd looks from the people of his village. Several Hyuuga sneered at the trio and one young Hyuuga genin almost attacked one…until he realized that they were heading towards abandoned apartments…were only one person lived. The Demon.

As they reached the building, some of the people started the chuckle darkly, while others started to cheer. The three Kumo-nin looked back and forth between the large crowed, the large building with boarded up windows and then, at the Hokage; who had an impassive look on his face as he led the way. When they were two hundred feet from the building, the crowed stopped following the small group, and instantly, 2 Jounin shunshined to their Hokage's side. The Kumo-Trio almost reached for their weapons, when the old Kage bade his guards to stay behind, earning slightly puzzled looks from the two Jounin.

"Are you sure Hokage-Sama? Going in there without detail?" one guard asked, earning a sharp angered look from the elderly Kage.

"I have no fear that these three will attack me, Shinji-San." Sarutobi almost hissed at the man, making the man back in fear.

"Th-That's not what I meant, Hokage-Sama…" the man stuttered.

"Do you want to teach preschoolers, Shinji-San?" the Kumo-Trio winced slightly at the tone that the kindly old man was now using.

"N-No sir…" the man sadly instantly.

"Then, I'd suggest that you shut your mouth and watch what you say." Sarutobi instructed him harshly.

"What was that about?" the young woman, leader of the Kumo-Trio asked as they resumed their walk towards the building.

"The boy's parents…well…they weren't exactly liked here." Sarutobi lied. "One was a spy who served Orochimaru under my direct orders and committed great sins against these people while doing so. And the other was an experiment from said man. Since he is their son, and the people know it, though the boy doesn't; they look upon him with the same hatred and fear that they looked upon his parents."

"Oh…" the loud mouth young man said.

The four made their to the entrance of the building and Sarutobi opened the door and let the Kumo-Trio in as if they were guests in his own house. Shutting the door, Sarutobi turned around to find the Kumo-Trio in shock at what they were looking at.

From the outside, the abandoned building looked decrepit and haunting. On the inside however, it was really nice. The first and second story had been merged into one large floor and had training equipment hanging from the high ceiling as well as catwalks and small ledges used for stealth and balance training. There were training logs and training dummies, the latter being full of holes from near constant use.

"It seems, that I will have to get him some new ones." Sarutobi mused as he looked at the training floor. "To anyone who comes in here uninvited by the boy or myself, it looks like an abandoned building." Sarutobi explained. "But to those who are welcomed in here, it reveals its true marvels and secrets."

"His parents' house then?" the leader of the Kumo-Trio asked?

"In a manner of speaking, yes." Sarutobi stated.

"Wow…those dummies look like he's been using them for years…" the more silent of the two male Kumo-nin stated in awe.

"Those have been here for two months." Sarutobi stated. "He is a lonely boy, and up until Nii Yugito came, just a few days ago, though I only found out about it late last night; he has been a walking time bomb. I was beginning to wonder if he would betray us or go on a murdering spree…" he said sadly. "He excels in ranged attacks and stealth…"

"Why are you telling us this?" the loudmouth asked. "Are you supposed to be keeping his abilities a secret from enemies?"

"Normally." Sarutobi nodded in agreement. "But, I have been hoping for a long time, that someone would come along and change him for the better…even if in this case, it is a little bit awkward…"

"You want to keep Yugito here?" the leader asked.

"In a way, yes." He said simply. "In less than a week, she has brought him from the point of murder and insanity to the state of an eight year old boy…in an extremely weird way."

"…" the leader was silent for a moment. Then, after some thought, she looked to her right and sighed. "I don't know what _I_ can do…but maybe, Kumo and Konoha can work something out…"

"WHAT?!" the loudmouth of the trio shouted. "What are you saying?"

"Well, it's just…when Yugito has her breakdowns, she usually shows up where she thinks is nice and safe…an affect of the Nibi and survival instincts merging together…so, if she continues to do this…she'll keep showing up here until the boy gets rid of her…which may not happen if he has taken a liking to her already…"

"So if we can work out an agreement..." Sarutobi started. "It would be almost like a Political Marriage…only…more awkward and funnier I suppose…"

"Maybe…" the young woman agreed, never minding her loudmouth teammate who was busy making faces at her and Sarutobi.

"_AH!"_

The sudden shout from upstairs made Sarutobi fear for the worst, as did the young woman and her teammates. What the Kumo-Trio leader hadn't told the elderly Hokage, was that the last time Yugito woke up from her mental blackout, she had been in a brothel, capture by a disgusting man who was trying to make her his. She ripped not only his face up in near primal rage, but she had also turned the man into a eunuch. Maybe she thought that the boy was trying to do the same.

She didn't know about the boys here in Konohagakure, but in Kumo, there were born perverts.

The four shinobi raced up the stairs and down the hall until they came to a large bathroom. Peering into the room, the four felt their eyes' pop out of their sockets at the sight before them.

There was no blood. There was no carnage. There was no torn clothing, other than what tears and rips the boy's clothes had before hand. No, the scene that met them was a near naked Nii Yugito, wearing nothing but a bathing suit, holding a squirming little eight year old boy, still fully clothed, over a tub of water.

Naruto, like most little boys, didn't like to take baths, that is, until they were in the bath, and then, they never wanted to get out. The four looked at the boy who was busy squirming and screaming at the top of his lungs to be let go, was being held by the collar of his shirt in the blonde woman's mouth…just like a mother cat would do to her kittens when she wanted to move them from one place to another.

Naruto, upon hearing a snicker, looked up with tears in his eyes to see four people in the bathroom door, all of whom were smiling…though three of them were smiling with deep, rosy red cheeks. The one who was just smiling, was a tanned skinned woman…the rest were men. One of the men he knew well.

"JIJI!" Naruto shouted. "HELP!"

Seeing where Naruto's head was facing, Yugito turned her head and instantly started to growl at the three men in the doorway. Said men instantly looked in a different direction, whistling as they did so.

"JIJI! HELP!" Naruto cried again. "KITTY WANTS TO GIVE ME A BATH! I DON'T WANT TO TAKE A BATH!"

Sarutobi took a step forward, only to be pushed back by an almost invisible force. Looking at Yugito, who had a small smile on her lips. Hearing a chuckle, Sarutobi looked at the other young woman from Kumo, and saw a rosy hue on her tanned cheeks.

"Great to have you back in the world of the sane, Yugito." The young woman addressed the assassin Jinchuriki from Kumo with a smile. "But, uh…what are you doing to him?" she asked.

"Bath time." The woman said simply.

"Oh…" the other woman stated. "SO…when did you regain control?"

"Last night…in the middle of my bath…" Yugito said slowly, as to not let Naruto fall from her teeth; her tone unchanging.

"In the middle…of your…bath?" both Sarutobi and the other woman repeated slowly. At Yugito's nod, she turned her attention to the boy dangling by his shirt and then opened her mouth. The splash and the scream that followed filled the room.

"BAD KITTY!" Naruto shouted as he resurfaced.

"Bad kitten." Yugito countered before joined the boy in the tub…much to the three watching males' delight.

"I'M NOT A KITTEN!" Naruto wailed as his 'Kitty' began to wash his hair with shampoo. "JIJI, SAVE ME!"

"Sorry Naruto…but…I learned long ago not to mess with a cat and her kitten."

"WAAHHH! I HATE BATHES! LET ME GO OR NO FOOD FOR YOU KITTY!"

Yugito responded with a soft, but stern bop on the head.

"So…all day today…was an act?" Sarutobi asked the blonde woman in the tub.

"Yes…bad kittens need to be punished…" Yugito replied.

The End

A oneshot that took me four hours to write… would have been done sooner, but there was interference. I hope you enjoyed.

I like Yugito, but I don't normally show it.

Now, I would like to issue unto you, a challenge of sorts.

I would like for someone, or someone_s_ to make a Naruto/Yugito story, where they don't realize that the other is also a Jinchuriki, nor do they fall in love instantly. Naruto is captured by Kumo, and stoic Yugito is left to deal with him. Slow moving romance and believable scenes would be best. The main challenge to this challenge, is that, when Naruto escapes, will he want to leave? Will he want to leave Yugito? Your choice.

One thing I would like to say is that I don't want the Akatsuki to be involved in the story as a constant or better yet, at all. Sure, there can be a group where Itachi hangs out with, and it can be called Akatsuki. But no Marda, and no mass Jinchuriki abductions. The main thing is that I don't really want the story to revolve around the Akatsuki and a rushed timeline.

Again, hope you liked it.


	2. Chapter 2

Kitty

* * *

Several weeks ago, my laptop decided that it was going to have a massive brain fart…and never loaded the main screen. I left it on for an hour to see if there were any updates that needed to finish loading…but no such luck. I had to issue yet another complete, head-to-toe reboot, which in turn, erased everything I had done. This includes English assignments, the second update for Shade, a small missive detailing a new story, a revised chapter of Shinobi Seed(which included a new plan to follow through with it), and of course, as per my luck; the next and almost complete second chapter of Kitty.

Now, I am putting Shinobi Seed's long waited revision on hiatus, working on this, Shade and a new story that at the moment is being called, _Heir of Uzu_; and will be continuing to re-configure what I am going to do about the new idea for The Marriage-Go-Round that will not leave me alone(which was also lost…)

Not having saved any of it onto a flashdrive, I lost all of it, and had to try and remember what I had written…to no avail. It wasn't something that I had done all in one day, so it wasn't fresh in my mind. I had started the chapter almost two weeks prior and like I said, didn't save it to anything. So your wait is because of me being a dumbass and my laptop's decision to not want to work properly. However, I took what funds I had and bought a flashdrive and it is sitting in my top dresser drawer, waiting to be opened and used for the first time.

I can't promise speedy updates, because it was supposed to be a one-shot, that I foolishly forgot to label as such; and I can't promise that they will be long chapters. I will write until I think it is long enough.

Now then, I would like to say that Kishimoto has finally caved and let me buy Naruto and all of his future titles for twenty dollars. I am sorry to announce that that scenario was only in my head…as was being the controller and overlord of a mega alien space ship that turned annoying people into life sized, walking, talking Twinkies that exploded upon touching them…So…yeah. I will not ever own Naruto and I will never be in control of a mega alien space ship that turns annoying people into walking, talking Twinkies that explode upon being touched(I wish…I truly, truly wish).

* * *

Umino Iruka felt his forehead twitching as he faced his class with his eyes closed with an extremely annoyed look on his face. Why was he so annoyed? Well, his least favorite student, Uzumaki Naruto, had just arrived to class…three hours late. When he asked the boy why he was so late, the boy told him the most retarded excuse he had ever heard.

"_I wanted to bring Kitty with me…but Jiji said no…"_

"_Naruto…you don't have a 'Kitty'."_

"_Yea-huh! I do too!"_

"_Since when?"_

"_Two days ago! Jiji said I could keep her yesterday!"_

"_Her?"_

"_Yeah!"_

"_How do you know it's a her?"_

"_Cause she's got boobies, duh Iruka-Baka!"_

"_Iruka-Baka huh?"_

"_Uh-oh…"_

"_Naruto…YOU HAVE DETENTION FOR THE REST OF THE WEEK!"_

"_HAHAHAHAHAHA!"_

"_SILENCE!"_

"Cause she's got boobies, huh?" Iruka muttered to himself. "And how does he know what a female cat's teat looks like anyways? I can't see anyone letting him check what gender their cat is…I'll have to ask him later I guess." Iruka really disliked talking to Naruto. He was immature and rude and smelled…most of the time. There were times that he came to class and smelled human…but they were few and far between. Taking a clamming breath, Iruka opened his eyes and looked out at his class, who were busy doing an extra three chapters of work thanks to Naruto's tardiness and hysteria inciting excuse. Well…almost everyone was doing their class work. Four students weren't. Nara Shikamaru, Akamichi Chouji, Inuzuka Kiba and of course, Uzumaki Naruto.

Nara Shikamaru he knew wouldn't do his work. The boy, for all of his genius, refused to put it use. He remembered the first day he had the boy, he said plainly clear that the only reason why he was becoming a shinobi was because his mother had threatened him into it…or risk losing his man hood. He grimaced slightly at the memory. He knew Shikamaru's mother was insane enough to follow through with her threat too.

Akamichi Chouji wasn't the brightest bulb in the box, but his excuse was that he needed to keep stuffing his gullet or he wouldn't be able to use his family jutsu properly and if that happened, he'd tell his father why he couldn't do the family jutsu. Akamichi Chouza wasn't a man someone wanted to piss off. He could flatten a man faster than Kakashi could come up with a lame excuse for being late to an event.

Inuzuka Kiba wasn't the brightest bulb in the box either. Maybe a bit brighter than Chouji, but not was smart as his older sister, Inuzuka Hana. A small smile wormed its way on to Iruka's face as he remembered her.

He had still been a Genin when she graduated from the Academy, and due to an odd number of graduates, she got to spend some time with him and his teammates for training exercises and D-Rank missions until the Hokage found a team for her to join. He remembered one day, one where they had to do yet another D-Rank mission; painting a house…oh yes, he remembered that day well. It was a really hot day and to counter act the sun's heat, she had taken off her training harness her mother had bought for her, and laid it on the ground. Iruka remembered staring at her a lot that day. It wasn't everyday that a teen only two years younger than yourself having the bust size of a young adult.

Iruka blinked as he felt hot liquid run down and out of his nose and quickly grabbed a tissue and pretended to blow his nose. No need for the class to laugh at him for thinking bad thoughts. Even if those thoughts were memories.

Anyways, back to Kiba.

Sure, he was no Hana; but he was strong. His clan's taijutsu was one of the strongest and most devastating in the village, so strong, that if it was pulled off correctly, it could drill through solid rock!

Then, with a glare, he turned to Naruto; who oddly enough, wasn't making faces at him which was almost like a routine with Naruto. Today, he was slowly lifting his pencil up off the desk and letting it drop on its eraser back onto the desk top. He seemed…preoccupied…as if…he was thinking about something that required a lot of thought. Maybe…just maybe…his excuse wasn't so much of a lie after all…he'd have to check it over with Hokage-Sama…the one that every shinobi in the village knew Naruto called 'Jiji'.

--

"I am really sorry, Nii-San." Said Jiji apologized to the trained blonde assassin. "I didn't think that he would leave you with…_That_…as breakfast." Yugito nodded at the elderly man before turning her head to look at _That_.

_That_, was the first bowl of cat food that Naruto had left for her to eat. The past two days, if the Nibi hadn't lied about the first day like she usually did when she told her of her actions while she was 'Neko-fied'; he had given her cereal and milk for breakfast. Cereal was not her cup of tea, but it was edible and it was sort of healthy…that is…when it wasn't full of tiny colored marshmallows.

'_Note to self, if I am going to stay here…no more Shinobi-O's with tiny Kunai and Shuriken marshmallows…'_ she told herself as she looked at the bowl of…Death…in front of her. _'Although, I would gladly eat some Shinobi-O's right now…'_

_That_, or the bowl of Death was in fact the nastiest concoction of foods she had ever seen. And she had been tortured before! This went up and beyond the kinds of physical pain she had endured. The boy, Owner…as she had called him earlier to the Hokage, who had asked her to call him by his real name, Naruto; had not meant to give her this for breakfast. Someone must have told him to do it. But who?

"If I'm not mistaken…I've seen this somewhere before…" Sarutobi said, breaking the young woman out of her brooding and plans for revenge upon whoever had told Owner what kinds of things cats ate. "Raw fish…milk...vegetables, which I had bought for him the day before you arrived…and three purple Shinobi shaped vitamins." _'This has _His_ name all over it…you are going to be sorry you told that to Naruto oh Perverted one…I guarantee it…'_

"Who?" Yugito asked, a strange, but deadly look in her eyes.

"My old pupil Jiraya. He did it as a prank on his teammate Orochimaru." _'Maybe that's why Orochimaru cut that hole in the front Jiraya's pants…and maybe that's why Tsunade blushes every time she sees him?'_ Sarutobi mused.

"Then I will find and kill this Jiraya…" Yugito said as she began to rise up from the chair she was sitting in.

"You can't do that…Jiraya probably thought that Naruto meant a _real_ cat." _'Or he didn't want to believe what he was seeing…if he even saw him that is…I swear, he's going to get killed one of these days with his eyes glued to a peep-hole._

"…" Yugito glared at Sarutobi. For close to three minutes she glared at him, making him slightly nervous to be around her at the moment. Finally, before Sarutobi decided to leave, she blinked at him. "Can I maim him?"

Sarutobi blinked at the question. A nin form Kumo…asking if it was alright to maim one of his loyal pupils. He would have said 'No'…but he had wronged her by telling Naruto what to feed her. He stood there, thinking…weighing the goods and the bads before he answered her.

"If you see him, in the future, you can hurt him…just don't kill him…or blind him…or break his arms…you can break his legs, but not his arms…"

"Can I-"

"You can't neuter him either." Sarutobi hastily added. He watched the young woman huff and mull it over before responding.

"I can beat him up…as long as I don't kill him, cause him to go blind, break his arms…I can break his legs, but not his arms…and I can't neuter him…is this correct?" the blonde asked.

"Uh…yes…" Sarutobi answered slowly, wondering what was in store of his old pupil.

--

Near the hotsprings, Jiraya, a master in the art of seals, sat outside the thin wooden divider that separated the men's side from the women's. He had a light red hue on his face and a thin line of drool that ran from his mouth as he sat there taking notes. He had came for information and what he was getting was a gold mine. Who knew that Orochi-Teme's old pupil was so adventurous? Who knew her friend was just as adventurous? Maybe the next issue of Icha Icha would be sub titled _Ice Queen and the Princess of Serpents_?

Suddenly, he felt it. The pressure...in his nose…and it was building. Clenching his eyes shut and bringing a finger underneath his nose, he hoped for it to go away. He did not need to lose any valuable information because of a sneeze wanting to say 'Hi!' to the world.

His efforts working, Jiraya removed his finger from his nose and opened his eyes. Looking back through the peephole, he smiled as he saw that he was now getting a very good picture of the two untouchable women in Konohagakure alone in the hotsprings, fooling around. He was having such a good time…that he didn't even feel it until it was almost too late.

Realizing that it wasn't going to go away, he quickly formed some handseals and preformed a jutsu that his favorite pupil had made for when one had to sneeze while on a mission, and summoned a bubble that surrounded his head. Without a worry of interrupting the two women at play, he let the sneeze erupt from his nose.

With a satisfied smile on his face; Jiraya peeled the bubble off of his head and thought for a moment. Suddenly, as if he had just received news that Tsunade was waiting for him somewhere stark naked, he flashed through another set of handseals and with barely any sound, the bubble disappeared. With a larger grin plastered on his face, Jiraya went back to his peephole…only to find a long, slender finger with purple nailpolish ramming into his eye.

--

Orochimaru smiled as he sat at the only table in the Akatsuki Headquaters. Finally, Thursday had arrived. He liked Thursdays at the headquarters. Why? Why would he like Thursdays in a place where the people were much stronger than he was and at least half of them hated him? Because it was chicken nugget day, that's why! Tender all white pieces of chicken lightly coated with seasoned bread crumbs baked to perfection, along with a side of mashed potatoes and gravy(could to without the potatoes, but the gravy only comes with the potatoes and the gravy made the chicken nuggets ten times better) green beans, a carton of chocolate milk and finally, a chocolate chip cookie! Sure, he had to pay extra for the cookie, but it was well worth it. Such a meal helped him take his mind off of things, like his secret base in Rice and wondering what else Deidara used those extra mouths in the palms of his hands for. After seeing the relieved look on the blonde girly-man's face one day after coming out of the bathroom, smiling at one of his mouth hands…really made a guy think. Thursdays made him forget such things!

He was so lost in thought that he never saw Itachi, the new guy, from his old home village, walk into the kitchen with a box of pocky in his hands.

"You want one?" The question shook Orochimaru out of his train of thoughts, which happened to be about chicken nugget Thursdays and all of its wonders; and stared up at the younger man's face.

"Huh?" He asked.

"You want one?" Itachi asked again.

"If you are volunteering to give me one of your eyes…then yes…yes I would love one." Orochimaru replied with a smile.

"I meant pocky…" Itachi said slowly, taking a step back from the deranged man in front of him.

"Oh...pocky…" Orochimaru stated slowly, realizing his fault. Maybe chicken nugget Thursday wasn't a good time to eat in the base…maybe the roof? Yeah…oh wait…the roof was a waterfall…oh well, he'd find a new place to eat his precious chicken nuggets then. A place where Itachi couldn't find him. "No thanks, pocky is disgusting and not to mention bad for you…nothing but sugar and fat…goes straight to your hips."

Suddenly, the room began to freeze, and Orochimaru realized what he had just said. He started to apologize…but was interrupted when a large bubble appeared in front him.

"What the-"

"AAA-CHHHHOOOOO!"

The bubble popped, sending a hurricane force gale of snot and wind at Itachi, sending him into the wall. Looking at the fallen teenager, Orochimaru started to panic. Itachi wasn't knocked out. In fact, he had just changed his Sharringan into a weird looking version. With a small grunt of effort, a black flame sailed towards Orochimaru…who dodged the flame and smiled at the teen. Until he smelled something burning. Turning around, he saw that he black flame had landed on his lunch…and was burning his chicken nuggets, his potatoes and gravy, his chocolate milk and his cookie! Looking back at Itachi, he growled at him.

"Of course, you know, this means war!" With that, the fearsome Hebi-Sannin lunged at Itachi with all his might. No one, NO ONE…destroyed his chicken nuggets and got away with it!

End

* * *

Yeah…kind of silly…but hey…I wanted silly, and what I say goes.

Alright, for starters, I'd like to once again say that I am sorry for how long the wait has been. I have had a lot of stuff pilling up on me like a laundry heap…and not the fresh kind either. Good news is that I have moved back in with my mom, and she doesn't care whether I use the internet or not. Bad news is I have lost my main source of inspiration, which was my sister's cat. By studying her, I came up with the ideas for the first chapter.

Don't expect a chapter right away, at least not for this. I am working on several stories, trying to get into a different college because I don't want to commute two hours both direction for classes. That and my car would probably fall apart if I did that… The next thing that should be coming is my newest story, called _Heir of Uzu_ which will have a longer summary in the first chapter/prologue when I get around to posting it. After that, I will be working on _Shade_ which is going to be changed around a bit, meaning a new prologue. Then after that I will be working on either _The Marriage-Go-Round_ and then finally, _The Shinobi Seed._ Whether or not I actually get it done is left to remain a mystery, but it may happen. First I have to find a site that doesn't charge to watch the episodes since all the sites I went to have decided to remove all of them…sometimes copyrights blow…and blow hard.

I hope you had fun reading it, and review if you want to. (I know there are probably grammar mistakes here and there, the same thing with spelling…but…when I read it, it looks good…but that's because I wrote it).

Till next time,

Ja Ne.


	3. Chapter 3

Kitty

* * *

Naruto grunted angrily as he lay underneath one of the long desks in Iruka-Sensei's class, with a small metal scrapper and a bucket. For calling his 'Esteemed' Sensei a 'Baka', he was given a week long detention, and Iruka wasn't giving him any slack either. The first thing Iruka-Sensei told him to do as punishment; was to rearrange the bookshelf on the right hand wall. The second thing he had told Naruto to do, was what he was currently doing; scrapping wads of chewed gum that had been discarded by sticking to the bottom of the long desk. So far, in the last hour, he had managed to clean the gum off the last two rows on the left side of the class. Now, he was on the third.

"You know, Naruto;" Iruka started from his position in the front of the class, looking over a stack of papers and grading them with red pen. "If you didn't call people names, you probably wouldn't be in this kind of situation."

"Merglefriggafrucka!" Naruto muttered from under the desk, ramming the scrapper hard against a rock hard piece of gum that refused to come off. _'I hate Sakura…'_ he told himself angrily. He knew where his now ex-crush sat in class, and he was currently in that spot scrapping off what was probably _her_ rock hard piece of _pink_ gum.

"What was that, Naruto?" Iruka asked.

"Nothing!" Naruto growled out, smashing the scrapper in to the stubborn piece of gum again and again.

There were a couple minutes of near silence between Sensei and pupil, and the only noise that could be heard was Naruto grunting occasionally with effort as he used the scrapper against the gum.

Iruka, having decided that he should take a break from grading papers, looked up towards where one of Naruto's legs stuck out just over the top of the desk. "Naruto…" he called, trying to get the boy to sit up and look at him. Unfortunately the battle between the young blonde and the rock hard gum was taking precedent. "You seemed kind of preoccupied in class today…Is there something on your mind?"

"No…" the blonde replied. "GAH!" There was a loud sound that reverberated throughout the class room and the blonde started hollered and started kicking his legs profusely.

"Are you alright, Naruto?" Iruka asked, standing up from behind his desk and moving towards the small blonde who was busy rolling around. As Iruka rounded around the desk where the blonde was thrashing about, he noticed that Naruto holding head with his left hand and squinting in pain. "Naruto?"

Without warning, Naruto started to sit up, forgetting that he was currently underneath the desk and smacked his head off the bottom of the counter-like-desk and started to trash about even more wildly than he had been seconds prior.

"OUCH!" he shouted. Sighing, Iruka stepped into the isle and grabbed Naruto's left arm and pulled him out from underneath the desk.

"You okay?"

"No!" Naruto huffed angrily. The blonde moved his hand away from his head, and Iruka could see a nasty looking gash had formed on the blonde's forehead. "The stupid Sakura's gum broke the scrapper..." Naruto explained, looking hatefully at the gum wad from his position. "I accidentally cut myself with the broken part…" Naruto finished, his face turning bright red as he did so. It was embarrassing to inform someone that they had been beaten by a stubborn piece of rock hard gum.

"Really?" Iruka asked, though it came out more as a sarcastic tone than he realized.

"YEAH!" Naruto shouted at the scared man, his blue eyes narrowed with anger and pain. Grabbing something from under the desk, Naruto nearly shoved the broken piece of metal into Iruka's left eye, causing the man to jump back out of fear of going blind. "See?!"

Taking a moment to catch his breath, and to calm his now speeding heart, he carefully took the piece of metal and inspected it. _'…it really did break under pressure…'_ "Naruto, stand up for a moment, would you?" The blonde nodded and slowly got to his feet and moved back from the desk that harbored the evil piece of gum. Iruka turned around, sat down and laid down. He made a face as he slid himself underneath the desk and gazed at all the gum wads left behind over the years. "Which one is it?"

"The _pink_ one…" the way that Naruto spat out the word 'pink'…if only Iruka knew that Naruto's obsession over the only pink haired girl in his class had withered and died over the course of about ten minutes…

Searching for the pink wad of gum, Iruka found himself starring at a rather large wad of pink gum, right over his face. With a sigh, he took the broken, and now kind of bloody tool, and slowly chipped away at the pink mound.

"The key to removing gum from the desks, Naruto, isn't brute force, but small, gentle strikes that will slowly chip away at it." Iruka said with a small smile as he continued chipping away at the pink mound. After a few minutes of slowly, gently, chipping away at the wad of gum, his small smile had been overrun by a large and rather nasty scowl.

"Not so easy, is it, Sensei?" Naruto asked, dabbing at the gash on his forehead with a sleeve.

"Shut up!" the older man snipped. He wasn't angry at the blonde, but the piece of gum _should_ have come off by now. Taking the blade, Iruka hesitated for a moment and closed his eyes. With a deep breath, he slowly opened his eyes…and then with a shout, he rammed the piece of metal into the gum wad…only for the wad of gum to seemingly move out of the way of the blade. "What the hell…"

"It moved on you too, huh?" Naruto asked. "It did that to me too…before…it broke the blade."

"It broke the blade?" Iruka asked, looking at the boy, who seemed to be standing upside down.

"Yeah…"

"I thought you said that it broke when you stabbed it?" Iruka asked.

"Well, it did…but it broke it...grabbed it and broke it and everything…" the blonde mumbled.

"...If I hadn't seen it myself, I'd smack you for being an idiot…" Iruka said. Staring at the wad of gum, which was now closer to his chest then over his face, like it had when he found it. Suddenly, in the darkness created by the desk, the gum wad turned around and glared at Iruka. It had tiny gray eyes and a black line running across it. Suddenly, it opened its line like mouth and a black tongue appeared.

"_Pbpbpbpbpbpt!"_

"…I think I'm done for the day…" Iruka said as his brain tried to figure out what he had just witnessed. Slowly, but carefully moving away from the living gum wad, he made his way back into the light of the classroom, and stared up at Naruto. "Did it blow a raspberry at you too?"

"No…it flicked me off though…"

"Huh…" Iruka said intelligently. "I think we should report this to the Hokage…what do you think, Naruto?" _'I am NOT teaching students in a classroom infested with demonic pieces of chewed, rock hard gum…no way in hell…'_

"Yes, Sensei…" Naruto nodded, still sopping up the blood from his wound. "Can I go now?"

"Sure…let me walk you home…I'll put some healing balm on your head once we get to your house…" Iruka offered.

"Okay…" Naruto agreed. "Jiji might be there too…"

"Why would Hokage-Sama be at your house, Naruto?" Iruka asked curiously.

"…Taking care of Kitty…" Naruto said, turning his head away from Iruka.

"…Naruto…If I find that this '_Kitty'_ of yours is real, then I'll wave your detention…'kay?" Iruka said as he got to his feet. "But if I don't…then…well..." Iruka trailed off as he turned back to look at Sakura's seat in his class. "Maybe not scrapping gum…but you'll still have detention for the rest of the week."

"Okay…" Naruto said with a smirk.

"Go ahead and get your stuff…I have to go get the papers and then we can be off." Iruka instructed the young boy, who nodded slowly and kind of stiffly.

--

"Where is Owner?" Yugito asked the old man in front of her. Her black eyes (1) digging in the man' gray eyes.

"Nii-San," Sarutobi started, sounding slightly exasperated; "first of all, please don't call him '_Owner'_," the elderly man paused for a brief second, shaking his head off any dirty thoughts that had started to form. _'Last thing I need is a nose bleed.'_ Yume, the only female in the Kumo-Trio who had come in search of Nii Yugito, had told him of the jinchuriki of the Nibi's great distaste for perverts…it scared him slightly. "His name is Naruto." The young woman nodded slightly. "And he isn't home yet, because he probably was given a detention."

"Detention?"

"Huh?" Sarutobi asked, looking at the blonde girl in front of him. No matter how old she was, she was technically a girl to someone who was older and already had a grandchild.

"Detention…what is a 'detention'?" the blonde asked again, from her spot on the floor.

"You've never heard of it before?" Sarutobi asked.

"No."

"Okay…" it was…odd…of course, she was a jinchuriki and was probably trained separately from her peers. "A detention is a punishment dealt to children who either didn't do what they are told or, did something that they aren't supposed to. Knowing Naruto, he's probably in detention right now for swearing or pushing someone." The boy, up until Yugito came into his life, was rather mean child. Of course, he was a product of his environment.

"Do these 'detentions' hurt?" the blonde asked, her eyes narrowing slightly.

"They can…depending on who's in charge of the detention, yes." Sarutobi answered. "However, most instructors don't hurt their students." The blonde nodded slowly, thought Sarutobi wasn't quite sure if she comprehended it fully.

"When will '_Naruto'_ get home?" Yugito asked, testing the given name of her Owner for the second time that day. It was odd. _'Fish paste swirls…'_ she thought to herself. Suddenly, she licked her lips, making one of Sarutobi's eyebrows to rise in confusion.

'_Wha?'_ "Uh…usually detention's last about three hours after the last class, which would mean…" Sarutobi trailed off, checking his pocket watch, which had a picture of a smiling monkey on it, picked out by his grandson for his birthday. Konohamaru was four, after all… "At about 6pm, he should be back."

"6pm…" the assassin repeated slowly. Suddenly, with a nod, Yugito turned around and crawled on the floor, leaving the aged leader of Konohagakure with an…ample…view as she rounded a corner and left his sight.

'_Oh…my…Kami…'_ Sarutobi told himself, patting his chest, right above his heart. _'She'll be the death of me if she keeps doing that…'_ Sarutobi, lost in his thoughts, didn't hear the door opening…Yugito however, did.

"Don't touch it, you Idiot!" a slightly aggravated man's voice flooded the large mansion.

"Bu-But, it's bleeding again!" a younger voice followed it.

"That's because you keep picking at it!" the man's voice came again.

Sarutobi, lost in thought, shook his head quickly and started to look around.

"DON'T TOUCH IT!"

"BUT IT HURTS!"

Suddenly, as quick as lightning, a pale, yellow streak sped out from behind the corner and leapt down the stairs. There was one thing going through Sarutobi's mind as he realized what was happening.

"_MeeRROOOWWW!!! HHHIIISSSHHH!"_

"_AAAHHH!"_

"Oh shit…"

--

Iruka was starting to get irritated with Naruto's antics. Since they left the academy, the boy had re-opened the wound on his forehead twice, and now that it had stopped bleeding, for the third time, he was touching it again.

"Stop touching it, Naruto, you'll open it again…" Iruka ground out.

"But…my forehead feels weird…all the blood is drying…it feels like dried mud…" Naruto protested. "I just want to wipe it off…"

"First of all, Naruto, how do you know what dried mud feels like when it's on your forehead?" Iruka asked.

"…uh…" Naruto started. How could he tell him that it was when he was used as a diversion for a peeping tom at the onsen last year. He didn't get beat up by the women…but he didn't get away scot-free either. "Never mind…" the purple haired woman…she was crazy…

"…fine…" Iruka said, letting the question go for now. "Anyways, if you keep rubbing it off, you'll just keep re-opening it. Wait till we get back and I'll take care of it; okay?"

"'Kay." Naruto huffed.

Iruka had been inside of Naruto's house before, several times in fact; but he had just learned of the genjutsu that protected him and the house last year when he dropped a sleeping Naruto off in his bed. It was amazing and dangerous that he had given him permission to enter in his sleep. _'Let's just hope no one from another village…or this village for that matter; gets in that way…'_

Turning his gaze upwards, he saw the large 'abandoned' building jutting out from the corner and smiled softly. Soon, Naruto would be patched up, and he'd head to the Hokage's Tower to tell him of the academy's newest problem…if the old shinobi wasn't inside waiting for Naruto, like the boy said he might be.

'_Kitty…'_ he thought to himself. He still didn't believe it, but the boy had been preoccupied basically the whole day while in class.

Within a few minutes, they pair had made their way to the front door, and Iruka smiled to himself. He opened the door…

"It's bleeding again…"

'_DAMN IT!'_ "Don't touch it, you Idiot!" Iruka snarled as he pushed the door open and grabbed the blonde's blood covered right hand and pulled him inside, shutting the door behind him.

"Bu-But, it's bleeding again!" the boy protested, frowning up at Iruka.

"That's because you keep picking at it!" Iruka told the blonde irately, glaring at the blue eyed boy as he did. But, as if he hadn't listened to him, the boy's left hand started to move up towards the gash…he quickly grabbed the appendage. "DON'T TOUCH IT!"

"BUT IT HURTS!" the boy shouted back, moving away from Iruka and glared at him…his glare, in the dim light of his house was pretty intimidating…

"You're going to infect it if you keep touching it-" Iruka had started to explain to the boy that if he kept touching the gash, it could get infected and make him ill…However, he had no chance to finish as he was tackled by a pale, lightning fast blur that sent him into the door he had just entered.

"_MeeRROOOWWW!!! HHHIIISSSHHH!"_

"_AAAHHH!"_

--

Yume, the only female member of the Kumo-Trio, glanced up from the desk she was sitting at, and looked out the window. She could have sworn she heard someone scream for their life. _'Oh well…'_ she told herself as she looked back at the desk. The letter she had sent out to the Raikage had seemingly made it to the big man, because she was staring at the letter that had been sent via hawk. _'…Someone's gonna cry…'_ she thought to herself. _'But who?'_

--

Iruka starred fearfully at the blonde teen, female, blonde teen, who had just body checked him into the heavy wood door behind him. He didn't doubt that he might have received a broken bone or two from that attack. He looked at the teen, and the snarl on her face, which was only enhanced by the sight of three fang like teeth and a feline like growling coming from her throat.

He looked at Naruto from his location, who was starring at the two, wide eyed and slightly afraid. However, as the seconds flew by, Iruka saw the boy's face split open with a real, genuine smile and tackled the teen who was currently snarling at him.

"NARUTO!" he hollered, wincing in pain as he did so. He was afraid that the crazed teen would turn around and attack the boy…but amazingly, she just let herself be tackled to the ground and rolled over the still bleeding boy and let him hug her, burying his head into the side of her ample chest. Iruka couldn't help the gulp that emitted from his throat.

"KITTY!" the boy shouted, hugging the teen, who simply smiled slightly and…_licked_ him…

Iruka's brain shut down…

'_Sh-S-She-She just licked him!'_

"Iruka!" the academy sensei felt his head snap to his right and found himself staring at the Hokage, who wore a face of concern and fear. "Are you alright?" he asked, kneeling near him. The action stopped the young blonde woman from licking Naruto and earned a growl from her. As she did so, Iruka saw it. The headband.

'_K-Ku-Kumo!?'_ "Hokage-Sama!" Iruka barked, he winced while doing so. "She's from K-Ku-Kumo!" As a Chuunin of Konohagakure, he had to make sure that the Hokage survived…so, he took a kunai from his leg pouch…which he was promptly bopped on the head for doing so…by the Hokage himself! "N-Nani?"

"I know she's from Kumo, Umino-San." Sarutobi said with a sigh. "She showed up here nearly a week ago…she's…different."

'_No shit!'_ Iruka swore at the older man mentally, and at the same time thanking Kami that the older man couldn't read his thoughts. "Wh-What is she doing he-here?" he asked.

"Currently, she's protecting her…Owner…" Sarutobi said, a healthy or unhealthy amount of blush appearing on his aged face as he stated that.

"Wha?" Iruka asked intelligently.

"That's what I said." The older man chuckled lightly. "Somehow, she managed to find herself in Konoha, with no memories and acting like a cat…Naruto found her, brought her here, cleaned her up and-"

"Cleaned her up?" Iruka asked, casting a side glance at the blonde teen, who was glaring at him in a manner that reminded him of Tora when the fat cat he chased when he was a boy, was angry. Thankfully, she kept her distance. Tora…didn't.

"He uh…gave her a bath…" the older man coughed slightly.

"He gave her a…"

"_HIISSS!"_

Iruka looked at the teen, whose face had turned into a nasty snarl, showing four fangs now and a vicious gleam in her eyes. The fact that she had black eyes only made her look even more frightening than she was moments before. He looked at the Hokage, who made a nose movement while looking at him pointedly and Iruka figured out why the insane blonde woman had snarled at him. He had a nose bleed.

"Anyways…she has become extremely protective of Naruto…and seeing that he's bleeding…and you shouting at him…well…" Sarutobi half explained and half shrugged.

'_Okay…so now I know why I got body checked into the door...'_ Iruka told himself.

"And while we're talking about it…why is his head bleeding?" the older man asked, his tone dropping several decibels as he did so. The temperature in the room seemed to do the same thing too. Iruka suddenly felt like a rabbit in a snare…

"Well…you see…Naruto was late for class, and gave me a poor excuse…" Iruka started to explain, the Hokage nodding slowly as he told the tale.

--  
The Next Morning  
--

Iruka sat down stiffly in the chair behind his desk and sighed tiredly. He had taken to the hospital after Sarutobi managed to get Naruto off of…_'Kitty'_…and patched the boy's forehead up. Looking out at his class, he spotted Naruto, snickering at him from his seat in the back. He pointedly ignored the boy and began the day.

"Good morning, class." He greeted, earning a chorus of greetings in return. "Before we begin, I'd like to ask Sakura to please move to the open space behind Hinata."

"Huh? Why?" the pink haired girl asked in a state of near panic.

"Because, your seat has been deemed a hazard to all who sit there…" the girl, and the rest of the class, save for Naruto, who nodded, fear and anger in his eyes as he stared at the girl's seat. As the pink haired girl finished her trek from one seat to the other, Iruka spoke again. "And, Sakura…"

"Yes, Sensei?" she asked, all spirit gone from her voice, making her seem almost lifeless.

"You are no longer permitted to chew gum within this establishment. If you have any with you, then please put it on the desk and I'll be around to pick it up in a bit." Iruka said.

"Huh? Why?" she asked again. "Why can't I chew my gum?"

"Hokage-Sama's orders. Take it up with him." The Chuunin informed the girl.

"Hai, Sensei…" her voice utterly lifeless. Within a minute there was a large pack of pink gum sitting on the top of the desk. _'We'll talk to that old Fart if it's the last thing we do! Cha!'_ Inner Sakura shouted somewhere in the back of her mind. Sakura didn't notice it, but the kids sitting around her did, but she had started to grin evilly as her inner-self began to talk to her.

'_Cr-Creepy…'_

Iruka stood up, walked to Sakura's new seat and took the pack of gum. As he made his way back to his desk, he looked at the pack of gum and read the label.

_Get Miko fresh breath!_

_One strip of Miko Gum equals long lasting, cool, fresh breath!_

_!Warning!_

_Don't stick Miko Gum under desks!_

_Side effects of doing so may vary between one or even a horde of Gum Demons!_

Iruka shuddered slightly as he pocketed the pack of gum. There were approximately six sticks of gum gone, and who knew how long Sakura had been chewing this kind of gum before the monster gum made its self known? He tried and failed to suppress a shudder as he sat back down in his seat.

Shaking his head, and slapping a grin on his face, Iruka began the day's lesson.

"Does anyone know what the name for medical jutsu are called?" After last night's surprise attack, one that went un-avenged for; Iruka thought that it may be helpful if he pushed healing jutsu into the kids' minds. There was a collective groan from the class and Iruka's smile quickly became strained with annoyance.

End

Omake: _based off of a real situation where one of my classmates got smacked by his sister's cat…twice…_

Shinn, the loudmouth member of the Kumo-Trio looked at the scarred faced man in front of him and burst out laughing.

"HAHAHAHA! YOU GOT BEAT UP BY A GIRL!" Before Iruka had a chance to retort, a small, orange and white blur shot out from underneath the brush that surrounded the sides of Naruto's hidden mansion, and was suddenly sent flying back a good ten feet. Landing on his rear, he looked around only to find a small orange and white cat with glaring at him.

"And you just got Pussy-Smacked" Iruka replied with a smirk. Shinn looked at the cat and glared. The cat simple smirked and opened its mouth...

_"Meow…bitch…"_ with that, the cat shot off into the forest, hiding itself for the next Genin team that had to retrieve it and bring it back.

* * *

This was written all in one night…and took me…I don't know how long to write. I know I listened to CD 1 of _The Essential Alive in Chains_ about five times…start to finish…

Anyways, there are some parts to this plot…wait a minute! There is no plot! There _may_ be one later…but at the moment, it has none…therefore making it easier to write lol. Yes, the gum has a part to play in the future…What? Wait and see my dear readers.

Anyways…for those of you who don't know, I have two new stories on my profile. _Heir of Uzu_, which will hopefully become an epic length story, and another humor story called, _Tenko-Sama_. Read them if you want to.

lol...I forgot to add my note...silly me.

1. It was rather hard to find out what color Yugito's eyes are since she doesnt appear in more than one chapter in the manga and only part of an episode in the anime, so I chose black for her eye color.

Hope you enjoyed this chapter...

Ja.


	4. Chapter 4

Kitty

* * *

Lol, I actually wrote a whole chapter…then scrapped it. WAY too freaking silly/stupid. Seriously. I put Shrek in it. Oh well, good thing it was a snow day.

To answer a few questions/exclamations…

Yugito: Yes, Yugito is indeed, insane in the brain-insane in the membrane. The reason why, is simple if you think hard about it. In my mind, people tend to look at things with power in order, weakest to strongest. The Biju, as we all know, are graded and referred to in the same way. Shukaku is the weakest, so the seal on Gaara, which was purposely botched so he'd have the ability to call upon its powers; but it was still a relatively weak seal. Sine Yugito has the Nibi sealed inside her, her seal isn't probably much stronger. How do we know this? Because it was relatively easy for her to start channeling the Nibi's power in the manga. If using the Kyuubi's chakra is toxic to Naruto, and those he attacks, and Gaara is driven insane by the Shukaku and its constant screaming for blood; then Yugito is partially insane from using the Nibi's chakra. She isn't as bad as Gaara, but there is still a consequence for using the Nibi's power, and being driven slowly insane seems to be a good fit…at least, it is for this story.

Iruka: He is a red blooded heterosexual male, and he's four-five years younger than he is in the canon. He still has fantasies about women, and seeing a young boy being pinned to the ground by a much older woman, who looks like Yugito does, only drives his pervert factor slowly up. He won't be as bad as Jiraya, or even as bad as Kakashi, but he will definitely more perverted than in canon. And yes, he can still be and will be; a dick at times.

Naruto: Let's face it, he isn't really that bright in the manga/anime. He's smarter than most people make him out to be, especially in stories where Sasuke is the leading roll; but he isn't all that bright(though Kishimoto does like making him seem more and more like an idiot). He's also young, and hasn't been allowed the pleasure of hanging out with animals all that much. He does, however, from the academy, know that some animals have chakra. So, when he found Yugito acting like a cat, but looking like a human, he thought that she may have been an animal trapped in a henge and couldn't break out of it. The night where Yugito speaks and gives him a bath? Well…Naruto does forget things from time to time, and combined with the fact that he thinks she's an animal in a human body…

**WARNING!** If you do not like my story, and choose to flame it, then please tell me why you don't like my story. Don't just say "This is crap, stop writing." Because if you do then not only will I erase your review/flame, but if you send it via Anon. I will eventually disable Anon. Review because you seem to be afraid of a pm response. Here's some advice: If you don't like my story and refuse to tell me why you don't like it, because "This is crap, stop writing" isnt a real reason: If you don't like it, don't read it. If you don't read it, you won't be bothered to write a review. And by the way, yes, I will erase your comment as it is a waste of space. If it had a real message to go along with it, then I may take it into consideration, but since it doesn't it's just a waste of space.

Anyways, without much else to say, let's get started!

Disclaimer: I own as much of Naruto, as I own as much of Harry Potter…However, since I am not a grown adult woman, I guess I don't own the latter, which means I don't own the former.

* * *

Sarutobi looked out at the Council as he sat in his designated seat in the Council Chamber. Next to him were two of his old teammates, Homura and Koharu. In his lap, were several pieces of paper, and in his right hand, was a pencil.

"…And that is what I propose we should add to the Academy's curriculum, starting next year." Inzuka Tsume finished her argument. The woman's idea was great. It was a new physical fitness program, to help young shinobi-hopefuls become more physically fit, to help them in their life was ninja of Konohagakure. The best thing about it was, that it eliminated the old code that stated that girls should have the right to decline from participating in that course, something of which was introduced several years ago when the Civilian Council still had a say in what went on in Shinobi lifestyles.

"It sounds like a good plan, Tsume-San." Homura agreed. "It's been a while since that old law came into play, and it is about time someone got around to changing it."

"I also agree." Koharu nodded her head. "I'm tired of seeing young girls, too infatuated with their crushes wasting away to nothing, graduating and then coming home in boxes after their second C-Rank mission."

"I also agree." Sarutobi nodded. "All opposed?" he asked the Council, made up of clan heads of the most powerful clans in Konohagakure, and several others who were well respected, even though they didn't come from such a clan. All of those in the audience raised their hands. "Alright then, it is agreed." Sarutobi said as he made a note on one of the pieces of paper in his lap. "Starting next January, the Academy will change their curriculum."

"Now, on to the next order of business." Homura stated. "Most of you don't know, but a recent discovery was made a few days ago by Uzumaki Naruto and Chuunin instructor Umino Iruka while Naruto was busy serving a detention." That earned a few snickers from several members of the Council. Naruto and detention was like the noodles in the ramen that the kid ate daily. They went together. Ignoring the snickers, Homura proceeded. "As it turns out, there is some sort of demon taking up residence in or Academy." That earned the old man more than a few looks. "No, Naruto is not the item that needs to be discussed; but rather, what he and his sensei found."

"As it turns out, there is a small, rock hard piece of chewing gum under one of the desks in Umino Iruka's classroom. It is pink in color and unlike all of the other wads of gum that had been scrapped off before, would not come off. Uzumaki Naruto actually received an injury from the task, when the blade of the metal scrapper actually broke while trying to remove the piece of gum." Sarutobi explained.

"So how does this make it a demon?" Maito Gai asked, his eyes narrowed in confusion.

"When Umino Iruka went to see why Naruto had yelped in pain, after the scraper blade snapped, and due to the pressure the boy was using to try to get rid of the wad of gum, he inadvertently cut his forehead open; Iruka also tried to scrap the piece of gum off the bottom of the desk. From what he said, and from my own personal witness, as well as Koharu's and Homura's; the piece of gum started to move along the underside of the desk, stuck a black tongue out at Iruka and blew him a raspberry." Sarutobi said as he motioned for Koharu to speak.

"We thought that it was a prank, however it was not as such." The aged and honored woman began. "There is in fact a demonic piece of gum in Umino-San's classroom."

"Where did it come from then?" Hyuuga Hiashi asked.

"According to Iruka-San, it came from a one, miss Haruno Sakura." Koharu explained. "According to him, Uzumaki Naruto had a crush on the pink haired girl, and knew that it was her seat where the demon was found. He told Hokage-Sama later that night after detention, that he had seen the pink haired girl discarding chewed pieces of gum under her desk. When Iruka-San confiscated the gum from her the next morning, he looked at the wrapper." With that, she produced a small pink and white wrapper and cleared her throat before reading.

_Get Miko fresh breath!_

_One strip of Miko Gum equals long lasting, cool, fresh breath!_

_!Warning!_

_Don't stick Miko Gum under desks!_

_Side effects of doing so may vary between one or even a horde of Gum Demons!_

"Are you sure that it wasn't a joke?" Chouza asked, pausing in the middle of bringing a chip to his mouth.

"Where did she get it from?" Shikaku asked from his place.

"It was no joke." Sarutobi answered Chouza. "And according to Haruno-San, she bought it during the last festival, several months ago, as well as a whole case of it."

"A whole case?" Inoichi asked.

"Yes." Homura nodded. "She told us that she has been chewing that brand of gum for close to two years now, informed us that it was made in the land of Mikos…which apparently is where Oni no Kuni is."

"Demon Country?" Aburame Shibi asked. "I didn't know they produced gum or any item there."

"It's a new company, apparently." Sarutobi said with a nod. "We sent a missive via courier bird to their leader; and just this morning we received word back from them."

"Apparently the factory where they produce the chewing gum is near the edge of the country, and supposedly it had been blessed several times by the now late priestess. They thought that their product was safe enough to sell. The warning, they said, was a joke. Miko cleanse demons, after all." Homura said with a small smile. "The warning was to discourage girls, and boys, who chewed the gum, from sticking the wads under their desks. They had no clue that it would actually turn into a demon."

"Wow…" Tsume breathed in shock. "Holy crap."

"Indeed." Shibi nodded his head in agreement.

"What are we going to be doing about this, then Hokage-Sama?" Gai asked. "We can't let that little pink monster steal the youthfulness of our youth!"

"We've confiscated the case of gum from Haruno-San, and have placed it in my office for now. Apparently, the new priestess is coming herself to cleanse the room and anywhere else Sakura-San has discarded the gum after chewing it." Sarutobi exclaimed.

"When will she arrive?" Hiashi asked. A priestess of Oni no Kuni who came to do what could be considered as a house call, was rare.

"Anywhere between this week and next week." Sarutobi informed them. "The new priestess is quite young, so it is going to take them slightly longer to get here than it would if she was older."

"How old is she?" Kakashi asked, speaking up for the first time.

"Too young for you, Hatake." Koharu snapped. "But if you must know, she's nine years old."

"Nine?" Chouza asked in disbelief. "Can she do the job is she's so young?"

"Her guardians assured me that despite her age, and attitude, she is very proficient in cleansing demons." Sarutobi supplied. "Anyways, now that you known that there is a small problem at the academy, I'd like to please ask you to not blame it on Naruto. Despite being the one who found it, he did not create it."

"Wouldn't dream of it." Maito Gai said with a thumbs up.

"Now, if that is all cleared up, let's get to the next order of business." Sarutobi said. "And I want you to all hear me out before saying a thing. Got it?" the Council members nodded slowly, wondering what the Hokage was about to inform them off. "In a few days time, an envoy from Kumogakure is going to be arriving." That brought about several gasps, shocked looks and one very irate Hyuuga. "They are NOT here for the Byakugan, and they are not here for any sort of nefarious business. In fact, the whole reason why they are coming, is actually due to Uzumaki Naruto."

"What do you mean, Hokage-Sama?" Kakashi asked, more intrigued than he had been since the beginning of the meeting, nearly three hours ago. "What does he have to deal with an envoy from Kumo coming to our village?"

"What I am about to tell you is and has been classified as an S-Class secret, punishable by execution." Sarutobi informed the Council members. "Do not say a word about the reason why they are coming to anyone, not even in your own clan. As far as the village knows, is that they are coming to patch up the failed alliance attempt several years ago."

"Several days ago, a lone Kumo-nin somehow made their way into the heart of Konohagakure without anyone noticing." Koharu began. She and Homura had been debriefed about this fact several hours prior; and because of this, they weren't wearing shocked expressions like the members of the Council were at the moment. "The Kumo-nin slipped in during a rainstorm and somehow made their way towards the residential sector of the village."

"Where is this nin now?" Hiashi asked coldly.

"In surprisingly safe hands, actually, Hiashi-San." Sarutobi informed the man. "I was as shocked as you are now when I learned of what had transpired, when I learned of this lone Kumo-nin had been living in the village for almost two days."

"Apparently during the rainstorm, Uzumaki Naruto found the Kumo-nin, covered in mud, and brought the nin to his house." Koharu resumed the tale.

"Why would he do such a thing?" Tsume asked in mild disbelief. "He should know that Kumo and Konoha aren't exactly friends at the moment, and should have taken him to you, Hokage-Sama!"

"He probably would have…had the Kumo-nin been in the right state of mind when he found her." Sarutobi explained.

"Her?" Tsume asked.

"Yes, her." Sarutobi nodded. "He told me that he found her in a mud puddle. He thought she had fallen and he went to see if she was okay." That earned a look from Kakashi.

"I thought he was still in his 'I'll make you all pay' kick?" Kakashi asked.

"He was…however, seeing that the woman was blonde, he may have thought that maybe she was related to him in some sort of way." Sarutobi said. It wasn't exactly a lie…Naruto never told him why he went to help Yugito at first, only that he liked her and wanted to keep her…as a pet…a pet kitty.

"Most of the Yamanaka clan has blonde hair, and yet he hasn't asked us if we were related." Inoichi exclaimed.

"No, but he knows that you didn't adopt him, so therefore, in his mind, you aren't family." Koharu stated, which made the younger man look a bit sheepishly at her comment.

"Anyways;" Sarutobi began. "After going over to see if she was okay, he found two out two things about her, which leads us to the future visit of an envoy from Kumo. One: she followed him home. Two…" Sarutobi trailed off, his face turning slightly red as he remembered what the woman had been doing to the boy in his office earlier that week. "Two…she was acting like a cat."

"Acting…like a…cat?" Tsume asked.

"Yes." Sarutobi cleared his throat with a small cough. "Apparently, this young Kumo-nin suffers from random moments of mental insanity, in which she acts like a cat."

"But why a cat?" Tsume asked, not fully understanding why someone would want to act like a cat, insane or not. Her question was mimed by the rest of Council with silent nods.

"…First…let me ask you a question." Sarutobi stated. "Do any of you know of an assassin by the name of Nii Yugito?"

Kakashi and Gai raised their hands slightly, as did Shikaku, Chouza and Inoichi. The others shook their heads slightly.

"She's one of Kumo's best assassins. She is currently ranked as an A-Rank assassin in the Bingo Book, despite being only 16 years old." Kakashi answered. "But why ask us that?"

"Because, the young woman who Naruto found, is none other than Nii Yugito, assassin of Kumogakure." Homura answered for Sarutobi.

The members of the Council started to talk amongst themselves, their voices getting louder and louder as time trickled by. After nearly two minutes of the jumbled sounds and talking, Sarutobi let off a small bit of KI to regain their attentions.

"I know that you are all wondering why we haven't detained her and interrogated her for trespassing…However, there are several reasons why we haven't." Sarutobi calmly explained.

"And what, Hokage-Sama, would those reasons be?" Hiashi snipped. Kumo and anything to do with Kumo was an almost instant reason for the pupil-less man to become irate.

"One, is that she is slightly insane and acting like a cat." Sarutobi said. "Two, Naruto had basically claimed her as his pet-"

"Wait a minute, Hokage-Sama." Kakashi interrupted. "He _claimed_ her as his _pet?_"

"Yes…"

"How? Why?" Kakashi asked, disbelief in evident in his voice.

"Naruto…thought, and still thinks, that Yugito is a cat disguised as a human…" Sarutobi said. "He knows that some animals can use chakra, most likely thanks to Kiba-San at the Academy explaining about his partner, Akamaru; and thinks that she is in a henge and can't get out of it."

"Haven't you told him otherwise?" Hiashi asked.

"No…and even if I did, it wouldn't matter. Naruto believes what he wants to, and I can't change his mind." Sarutobi admitted. "That, and she acts like a cat around him, except for one time, he thinks that that is what she is."

"Why does she think that she is a cat, Hokage-Sama?" Gai asked.

"Well, the same day I learned of Yugito's presence in the village, or more specifically, her presence in Naruto's house; was also the day I learned why she acts like a cat." Sarutobi explained slowly. "A team of Kumo-nin came to the tower and requested an emergency meeting with me. As I met with them, I learned that Yugito acts like a cat, not just because she is slightly insane; but because of her tenant." That sent a wave of shock through the Council. "Nii Yugito is the Jinchuriki of the Nibi. Being a weaker Biju, the seal used to contain the Nibi, isn't as strong as the one that holds the Kyuubi. In a sense, Yugito was supposed to be a weapon. However, every time she uses the Nibi's power, not only does it mess with her brain, but I am also told that it leaves her basically in a preset, instinctive line of thought that is closely resembled to that of a cats. In that state, Yugito seeks for a 'safe' place to stay until her human conciseness returns."

"And let me guess," Hiashi interrupted slightly angry by the turn of events. "When she entered the village, she was in one of those mental trances and just so happened to run into Naruto."

"Exactly." Sarutobi said with a nod. "And seeing that he meant no apparent harm to her, Yugito followed him." The members of the Council shook their heads slowly in disbelief. "Unfortunately, even though she is in control of her thoughts and mind again, she has taken a liking to Naruto and has begun to refer to him as Kitten or Owner." There were a few gulps and red faces in the audience of the Council after that.

"What about the Kumo-nin who told you of all this?" Hiashi asked, his face red with anger, not anything else.

"They were sent to do one thing." Sarutobi stated. "Bring Yugito back to Kumo as fast as possible. Unfortunately for them, Yugito doesn't want to go, and they aren't strong enough to force her back by themselves. That…and I think Naruto used his Puppy-Dog-Eyes on the leader and only female member of the team, Yume."

"Oooh." Tsume hummed out with a smirk. "So he still has it, huh?" she liked the boy's Puppy-Dog-Eyes… it made him look so cute and hard to stay made at!

"Unfortunately yes." Koharu nodded. "It is an almost undefeatable technique."

"So is the envoy coming to actually try and reform and alliance…or are they coming just for their jinchuriki?" Hiashi asked bitterly.

"A little of both…" Sarutobi said with a small sigh. "It really depends on who Kumo sends. If they are all female, which could be possible; then it is more than likely they will try to work something out between the two villages…seeing as women seem to fall for Naruto's technique more often than men do." Even the most battle scared and hardened men could fall prey to Naruto's Puppy-Dog-Eyes. Only one person had ever overcome that technique.

"If they are men, I think they will fight harder to bring her back peacefully…if Shinn and Tenchi, the other two on the team sent to retrieve Yugito are any indication. Despite being insane at times, Yugito is a very stunning young woman." Sarutobi added. "But...the main thing we should take into consideration is not to make any of them mad or go after Naruto for that matter. Yugito seems to be highly protective of Naruto."

"So, not only do we have demonic wads of gum in our village, but we also have a foreign and slightly insane jinchuriki from a potentially hostile village living with our jinchuriki. We have an envoy from Kumo coming and a very young priestess coming all within the same time frame?" Shikaku asked, earning a nod from Sarutobi. "Troublesome."

"Agreed." Kakashi nodded. However, in the back of his mind, Ecchi-Kakashi had been sitting behind a desk with a pencil. _Kakashi-Sama! _The figment of the silver haired man's imagination shouted. _'We must keep her in the village with Naruto!_

'_Why?'_

_Think about it! Our own live Icha Icha story! We could even make our own books and sell them, earning millions of Ryou! Then, we could go buy an island in the middle of the ocean and spend the rest of our days with a giant sea turtle, training little kids to be martial artists and having their female, blue haired friends come over!_

'_No more Dragon Ball before bed…'_ Kakashi told the figment of his imagination. _'It should be more like this: We make millions of Ryou, and then get our own island. Then we build a mansion and fill it with scandal clad maids! And all the maids will have to do what we say!'_

…_Yes…YES!_

**_Let's do it!_** both Kakashi and mental figment exclaimed. At the same time, every women in the Elemental Nations shuddered.

Three miles away from Suna, Haku shuddered uncontrollably, earning a look from Zabuza.

End

* * *

Omake: The Continuation of Orochimaru: Revenge for the Chicken Nuggets...Well...Maybe...

Orochimaru carefully slunk around the basement of the Akatsuki base as quietly as he could. Ever since Itachi had burnt his chicken nuggets, he had been trying to find where the younger boy slept. It had taken several days and the lives of several of his underlings to find the right room. But finally, he had found the right room.

Picking the lock, Orochimaru opened it and carefully slipped into the room. What he found stunned him…

He had found what he had been searching for, Itachi's precious pocky cases alright. A whole warehouse full of every flavor of pocky known to man…and several known toe weasels! But that wasn't what made Orochimaru shell shocked. No…not by a long shot. It was what he saw in the very front of the room. It was Itachi's bed.

The comforter that was lying on top of the bed, was green and had a large, smiling purple dinosaur waving at the ceiling. The bed also had two pillows. One was white and covered in rainbows, and had a small girl with multi-colored hair and a pony in the background, while the other had four different colored fuzzy…things with dipsticks sticking out of their heads with little TV screens on their stomachs.

"How come he gets such nice things? I want a Barney blanket! I want a Rainbow Bright pillow case! I want a Teletubie pillow case! Waaa-aaaahhh!" With that, Orochimaru ran off to find Leader-Sama. It was so unfair that Itachi, the new kid, had been given such nice things!

* * *

Omake 2: The reason why Kami hates Sarutobi part 1

"Hello, Baby!" a younger, and slightly drunken Sarutobi said as he sat down at the bar next to a beautiful blonde haired woman. "How's about spending a night with me?"

"S-Sen-Sensei?!"

"Ts-Tsunade?!"

* * *

Omake: The reason why Kami Hates Sarutobi part 2

"Hello, Sweet Thing!" a younger, and slightly drunken Sarutobi said as he sat down at the bar next to a beautiful raven haired woman. "How's about you come with me, and I'll show you why they call me 'The God of Shinobi'!"

"Sensei?"

"O-O-Oro-Orochimaru?!"

"What are you waiting for, Sensei? Let's go!"

"AAAAHHHH!!"

"Damn that Orochimaru…always getting special training!" a white haired teen hissed as he watched his sensei dragged upstairs by Orochimaru. "I want special training too!"

* * *

There you go…a fourth chapter and three omakes.

I don't know if I like the end of this chapter all that much, so I may change that later on…but for now…it's there.

_Tenko-Sama_ will probably updated after _Heir of Uzu_, and _Heir of Uzu_ is about 50 percent complete.

Anyways, I hope you had fun reading, please tell me if you see any spelling mistakes, I know there are a few, but in my eyes it looks perfect; but that's because I know what it's supposed to say, so I trust others to tell me!

Ja ne!


	5. Interlude

Kitty

* * *

Alright, well, someone stated that I was getting off track, and forgetting Naruto and Yugito. Though it seems that way, now that this is an actual story, there are going to be 'dry' periods, meaning Naruto and Yugito won't be getting a lot of time…or at least not for the moment. However, I do have to admit that he/she is right, and I am spending too much time on other events, this is a chapter dedicated to what happens at Naruto's house on the weekends.

* * *

Naruto opened his eyes slowly as he felt the rays of sun wash over his tan face. Of course, like most people would, he instantly closed them after opening them to what seemed like a high power lamp only inches away from his face. Shaking his head, mainly to get the pain out of his head, he slowly began to sit up. After he sat up, he slowly opened his eyes and let out a large yawn before smacking his lips.

Stretching his arms out above his head, he slowly began to look around himself. Looking from side to side, he found what had quickly become the object of his affection, and attention whenever he wasn't at school, lying on his bed just to the left of him. As he looked at her, he couldn't help but think about what Iruka-Sensei had tried to tell him a couple days ago after the man had met Kitty.

'_Stupid Iruka-Sensei…doesn't know what a Kitty looks like…'_ he thought sleepily as he gazed at his pet.

He was going to lie back down and snuggle next to his pet, but his body had other ideas. So, quickly, and as quietly as he could, Naruto slunk out from his bed covers and made his way to his bathroom. After all, a boy has to do, what a boy has to do.

Once inside the small, room, Naruto turned around a closed the door. Out of habit. He still remembered the day he had been told to always shut the door if he was using the potty.

_It was a dark and stormy afternoon. The trees were bending in the force of the gale like winds and the rain was as thick as syrup. The deafening roar of the rain pelting against the Hokage Tower was enough to drown out almost any noise. Including the sounds of a small boy using the potty._

_A tall girl, with long, wavy black hair and piercing red eyes, had just arrived at the tower. She had been ordered by the Hokage, to go and deliver a message to the Academy director and she was soaked to the bone. So, the first thing she did besides hand in the message that the director of the academy had written back to the Hokage, was go to the nearest restroom and try to soak up as much water out of her hair and clothing as she could. Paper towels didn't do much, but if it kept all those lecherous perverts from trying to see through her top, then it was something she'd just have to do._

_As she walked along the hallway, she noticed that the door was open and the light was on. Thinking that someone had just left the room without shutting the light off, she decided to waltz in. However, she hadn't even made it a foot inside the small room, when she saw a small, blonde haired boy sitting on the toilet, kicking his legs back and forth, using the sanitation device._

_She blinked at him, and he blinked back. She was going to back out of the room, and shut the door as she did and wait until the small boy was done…but before she could…_

"_Hi Nee-Chan!" the boy chirped at her, not embarrassed in the slightest as he waved at her. "Did you come to make a pee-pee too?"_

_Her eyes began to twitch._

"_No…I didn't." the woman said curtly._

"_Did you come to make a poo-poo?" her eyes twitched again._

"_No." she replied as nicely as she could. She knew who the boy was…and she knew what he harbored…however, he was only about four years old. Four year olds were small…and most of them didn't know enough to close the door to a restroom when they were using it. So…she'd just have to inform him._

"_Did anyone tell you, that when you use the potty, you're supposed to shut the door?" she asked as nicely as she could. The boy shook his head. "Well, from now on, when you have to use the potty, shut the door. Okay?" the boy thought about it for a moment and then nodded with a smile. "Oh!" she exclaimed. "And remember to wash your hands with soap and warm water after your done too." There was no way she wasn't going to tell him that. Most little kids didn't want to wash their hands after using the bathroom. As the boy nodded, the young woman with the wavy, black hair and red piercing eyes backed out of the restroom and shut the door for him._

Drying his hands on a small hand towel, Naruto turned around to the bathroom door and opened it and peeked out of the small room. Looking over to his bed, he smiled to himself as he saw his pet still lying on the bed. With a wicked grin, not an evil grin…but definitely a wicked one; he slowly made his way over to his bed. Stopping at the edge of the bed, he squatted slightly…before launching up into the air…and crashing down on his bed.

This did two things.

One; it made the bed shudder and shake.

Two; it bounced Kitty into the air, which woke her up with a yelp…and then she came crashing down…right onto Naruto. Who then proceeded to smile widely at her and hug her.

"Good morning Kitty!" he chirped loudly as he hugged her.

Kitty, on the other hand looked ready to slice-n-dice. However, she stayed her hands, for a moment… Naruto soon found himself rubbing a spot on his head from where Kitty had bopped him for his stunt.

"It's Saturday, Kitty!" Naruto happily chimed out to his odd pet. Kitty, just looked at him, slightly disheveled from her rude and unexpected wake up call. "Guess what that means?" Kitty knew what Saturday meant, she had had many Saturdays when she was younger. However, for the sake of keeping her 'Owner' happy, she merely cocked her head to the left and stared at him, waiting for his reply. "It means, I don't have to go to the Academy today!" the younger blonde chirped again. "That means, we're gonna have lots of fun today!"

Though she didn't show it, Kitty, aka Yugito, smiled inwardly. Instead, outwardly, she ducked her head down low, and rubbed her left cheek on the side of his head, making him giggle.

--

Kitty stared down at the evil concoction that was placed in her bowl. It was that dish from earlier in the week. _'I thought the Hokage talked to him about this?'_ she wondered silently, with a frown on her face. She looked up at her 'Owner' and mewed softly, gaining his attention. He looked at her and blinked in confusion. She mewed again.

"No, Kitty." Naruto said with a shake of his head. "Iruka-Sensei says Kitties aren't supposed to eat _Shinobi-O's_." Kitty's right eye twitched slightly. "And besides!" the younger blonde chirped. "Jiji told me that you liked this stuff! He said you ate it all up!" Of course, what Naruto didn't know, was that Sarutobi had lied to him, not wanting to hurt his feelings. Kitty's right eye twitched again.

Seeing Naruto turn back to his bowl of cereal and back to reading his manga, this one was about a boy who turned into a girl when splashed cold water; Kitty sniffed angrily and went back to starring at the evil concoction in the bowl.

'_Must kill Jiraya of the Sannin…'_ she thought to herself. Wait! _'I can't kill him…I can hurt him, maim him, break his legs but not his arms, and I can't neuter him.'_ She reminded herself. She needed to remember…it wasn't as if she was allowed to hurt other village's shinobi without getting into trouble often. She didn't want to lose that privilege too soon. There were…others she would like to 'maim' other than just Jiraya. Like a certain silver haired man who had decided to look in on the building for the last two days. Or rather, looking in on her interactions with Owner.

Shoving the bowl of nastiness away from her, Kitty padded over to the base of the chair her Owner sat in, occasionally laughing like a loon as he read his manga, wincing in pain, depending on the situation; and mewed softly. This had no affect, mainly due to the fact that Naruto had burst out in laughter at the same time. A small tick in her left eye this time, Kitty reached up to his lap, and gently bopped his right leg with her hand and slowly, moved it across his leg, which in turn, earned his attention.

"Mew."

"What?"

"Meew."

"What'cha want, Kitty?"

Kitty looked towards his cereal and mewed again.

"Iruka-Sensei says that Kitties can't eat cereal." Her Owner said again. "Besides, you got's your own food." He said, pointing at the bowl of evilness off to her side.

"Merooow…" she replied irately.

"…" he Owner looked at her slightly confused, but soon shook his head.

"_Meroooow…"_ she nearly growled. The boy looked down at her…and then bopped her on the head. _"HISSS!"_

"NO KITTY! THAT'S A BAD KITTY!"

"_MRRROOW-HISSSS!"_ with that, Kitty lunged at him.

"AHH!"

--

Sarutobi sighed to himself as he made his way towards Naruto's house. Even though he had called the meeting to an end a few days ago, several members of the Council had opted to take smaller, more personal meetings with him. Thankfully, the Council members had decided to leave him to his whims for today. Or at least, so far.

Being Saturday morning, he had decided to take a trip to Naruto's and see how things were going. After all, it had been a good day or two since he had time to talk with him.

As he made his way to the front door, he paused for a second and thought about the Kumo-Trio sitting in their guarded hotel room.

'_Maybe they should be here…Or at least, Yume. She seems to be the only sane member of the bunch.'_ He wondered. He had little doubt in his mind that the Raikage wouldn't let Yugito stay here in Konohagakure, and maybe if Yume was here, she could talk to Yugito about it all. Maybe ease the blow? Of course, he'd have to console Naruto. But it would be easier to have someone who was closer, or at least more used to dealing with Yugito, deal with her, as he dealt with Naruto.

With a small shake of his head, he took a key out of his pocket and brought it to the door handle and unlocked the door. As he stuck the key back into his pocket, he twisted the door handle, but stopped when out of the corner of his left eye, he saw a tuft of silver hair, peeking into the building. Of course, to most anyone, the inside of the building would look like an old abandoned apartment building. But there were a few other people in the village who could see into the building and see what it really was. And this silver haired man was one of those people.

"I wonder what would happen, if a certain assassin were to find out that someone was watching her? Maybe she'd stop just shy of neutering them?" The silver tuft of hair seemed to shiver for a moment, before vanishing. "Haha…" the aged man let a chuckle escape his lips.

As he heard the metal piece move into the door, Sarutobi pushed on the door and walked into the building. After getting out of the way, he closed the door and locked it, so no unwanted visitors would be able to enter. Turning back to look at the first floor, he took in the states of the target dummies.

Two of them were shredded completely. The levels of destruction made it clear that it wasn't Naruto's doing. One dummy was almost to that point, and had several pieces of paper in front of the head piece. Walking over to it, Sarutobi felt his eyes widen as he realized what the pieces of paper were. They were crudely drawn pictures of Haruno Sakura. _'Why would he…oh yes…the gum…'_ Sarutobi thought to himself, shaking his head as he did so.

"Naruto!" he called out, as he made his way towards the stairs and the second floor. "Naruto!" He called out again. Again nothing.

As his thoughts began to take over his mind, wondering if Naruto was even home or not, he didn't notice a small, blonde figure sneaking up behind him.

'_He wouldn't have taken her outside, would he?'_ Sarutobi wondered to himself. _'…Of course he would…He's Naruto…why wouldn't he?'_ He was about to turn around and make his way towards the front door, when he felt something smack his back…hard. He whirled around, ready to strike…only to find the smiling face of the boy who he had been calling out to minutes before.

"Jiji's it!" he called out excitedly before running off like a loon, waving his hands high in the air over his head and waving them as he did. "Kitty! Jiji's it!"

Sarutobi stood there, still in the middle of a strike, thinking about what had just happened. _'I'm…it?'_ he asked himself.

"Jiji's it, had a fit! He's a stupi-"

"NARUTO!"

--

"Naruto, what did I tell you about name calling?" Sarutobi asked the blonde haired boy, who was busy sitting in a chair on the other side of the kitchen table.

"It's not nice to call people names, Naruto-Kun." Naruto replied, trying his best to sound like Sarutobi. Sarutobi could almost see the boy making faces at him as he did so…however…all he could see was a tall, blonde, young woman, who for the last week or so, had been living here, acting like a cat; sitting on the boy's lap and occasionally licking the top of his head. Either that…or rubbing his face with hers.

"Um…Kitty…could you please get off of him? I'm trying to scold him" Sarutobi asked nervously. The young woman turned her head and over her shoulder, she glared at him before returning to groom the boy.

"Haha!" Naruto exclaimed loudly, pointing at Sarutobi from behind Yugito's body…or tried to anyways. Because he couldn't see through the woman, he ended up pointing at the sink behind him. "She won't listen to anything you say, Jiji! Because she's mine, and not yours!"

"Alright then," Sarutobi began. "How about you tell her to move, so I could talk to you, and not the back of her head?"

"Fine." Naruto mumbled. "Kitty, can you move, please? Jiji wants to talk to me." The woman didn't budge.

Sarutobi snickered. "Looks like she doesn't listen to a thing you say either, Naruto-Kun." He could hear the boy growl slightly, and he chuckled to himself.

"Kitty is a cat, Jiji." Naruto began. "And Iruka-Sensei says that cat's don't listen to people all that much." Sarutobi blinked.

'_Is Iruka really going to play this game too?'_ Sarutobi asked himself.

"Iruka-Sensei also says, that cats are like women. Sometimes you should just shut up and let them do what they want to do…Or else."

"Or else what?" Sarutobi asked.

"I couldn't really hear him, because he was mumbling, but I think he said 'Or else you end up sleeping on the couch.' or something like that." Naruto said while hugging the young woman in front of him tightly, earning a low purr sound from the confused woman on his lap.

'…_Iruka...what have you been teaching Naruto?'_ Sarutobi wondered.

"Oh! No, wait!" Naruto exclaimed loudly, making Yugito cringe for a second. "That was the weird man with the funny beard who smokes a lot." Naruto stated. "Iruka-Sensei says, that you should let a cat do what they want, or else they'll scratch you."

"…And has Kitty, ever scratched you?" Sarutobi asked.

"Once or twice…but that's usually at bed time…she keeps stealing the blankets."

"B-Blankets?"

"…and she takes the pillows…"

"Pillows?"

"Oh! And one time, she scratched me because I accidentally touched her boobies."

"Naruto-"

"But that was because I was twirling around like one of those whirly-seeds, you know, the ones that fall down and look like their twisting? Yeah…I accidentally touched her boobies doing that."

"Naru-"

"And there was earlier today, when I jumped on her."

"What would make you jump on Kitty?" Sarutobi asked quickly.

"We was playing hide-n-seek,"

"It's 'We _were_' not 'We _was'_, Naurto."

"Whatever." Naruto said with a wave…or at least Sarutobi thought it was a wave. "Anyway, we were playing hide-n-seek, and I was seeking her, but she was really fast! So, when I found her, I had to tag her…I couldn't catch her…so I climbed up the railing and jumped on her! I won!" Sarutobi could almost see the smile on the boy's face.

"I don't think it was nice of you to jump on her." Sarutobi said, closing his eyes. He could feel it. It was coming…no need to let a young boy see it. Although, if Yugito was still sitting on his lap; then he wouldn't have to hide it. "You could have hurt her."

"Jiji, why'd you close your eyes?" Naruto asked.

'_Crap!'_ Sarutobi cried out mentally. "I-I…My eyes hurt a bit, Naruto…I'm resting them." Sarutobi quickly lied.

"…Ecchi." Naruto chirped with a face splitting grin. "You were thinking ecchi things, weren't you, Jiji?"

"No, no!" Sarutobi said quickly. A little too quickly. _BOP!_

"HAHAHAHA!" Naruto exploded with laughter. "Kitty bopped you!"

"…Ecchi…" Kitty breathed out quietly. While Sarutobi heard her, Naruto didn't.

* * *

There we go…an interlude. I was going to make it a bit longer, however…I'm _still_ sick…and when I'm sick, I'm not the best thinker.

Alright, well, there is a note in my profile. Basically my laptop is out of commission, thanks to two or more powerful viruses, that completely shot Norton to hell and back. Until I get it cleaned up, updates will be slower, as my mom's computer is loud as heck and the computer shut down time is 10pm.

I have two challenges, though one is not in the challenge section of my profile. It's near the top. So, look at them if you want.

Anyway, thanks for reading, and hopefully, I can find the money to fix my laptop soon. Ja Ne.


	6. Chapter 5

Kitty

* * *

Alright, because for some reason I can't watch the Shippuden film, I'm not adding Shion's bodyguard…you know, the one with the 'Gender-Bender' jutsu…yeah, he's not in it(not that I'd use him even if I could watch it…that guy wasn't very funny.) Anyway, because I'm not adding him in, I'm going to be pugging(WoW term) or borrowing two of my favorite characters from another anime/manga…Madarame Ikkaku and Ayasegawa Yumichika. No, this does not mean they are going to be wielding their Zanpakutos around. I'm merely using them for humorous tidbits here and there.

Exciting information! I have my laptop back up and running! YOSH!

Turns out my laptop was actually hijacked by new/semi-new spyware that came ultimately from using Facebook. Did you know that when looked up as _Facebook Spyware_, on Yahoo, that there are over 27,000,000 links! Yeah…won't be using Facebook anymore…Oh, and a piece of information, don't befriend anyone you don't know, because more than likely, it's a Spyware link.

Anyway, laptop is fixed, took a few days to download everything. It's odd. I can get anywhere from 32-42 FPS on WoW on a non-broadband wireless connection for hours, and play through raids and what not with really good FPS and low latency, but it takes HOURS to download stuff…odd. Oh well…

Thank you **Mr. Fix-It-NAO **for pointing out the _Ranam/Ranma_ error. It was _Ranma_ but something happened to it after I saved it. I know it was because I had JUST added that part before uploading it. I blame Spellcheck. I hit it and it did whatever it thinks is spellchecking.

Now, back to the story…

I do not own anything other than the plot…which is rather odd, so hopefully, you all know that its mine. The characters I do not own, for if I did, Tobi would have been a completely different character from Madara…who sucks. Tobi = cool. Madara = Sucks. Nuff said.

* * *

Sarutobi sighed as he looked at the clock on the wall to the left of his desk. _9:43pm_ it read.

'_Today has to be one of the longest days I've had in a while.'_ He told himself as he looked at the stack of paper on the left hand side of his desk and then at the smaller stack of paper on the right side of his desk. _'Twenty three submissions requesting a new training ground…'_ Letting out another sigh, Sarutobi leaned back in his chair and started to think about the last few days.

'_Iruka and Naruto found an infestation of Gum Oni in the Academy. Iruka found out about Yugito. We learned that Oni no Kuni is sending their newest and youngest miko to deal with the Gum Oni. Kumo is sending a team to try to figure out what's going to happen with Naruto and Yugito. The Kumo-Trio is getting anxious from being locked up in their hotel room. Kakashi has been peeping in on Naruto and Yugito; and Yugito is getting mad about it. Yugito is acting more like a human now, but Naruto either doest see it, or refuses to see it, and what's more; is that Yugito is calling him _'Owner'_ now instead of _'Kitten'_._ He looked up at the ceiling and sighed yet again. "Kami…why did I ever retake this job?"

A knock on his office door stopped any reply from Kami.

Again, for the five hundredth time that evening, Sarutobi sighed.

"Yes?" he asked.

"Hokage-Sama." A young man's voice came through the hard oak door. "I thought you'd like to know, that a small group of people have just arrived from Oni no Kuni at the east gate."

"Thank you for informing me, Ebisu-San." Sarutobi replied to the man on the other side of the door. "If you aren't busy, accompany them to my office, would you?"

"Hai Hokage-Sama!"

As the man, Ebisu, ran off down the hall, Sarutobi looked down at the far right corner of his desk and sighed again. Moving a small statue of a monkey his grandson had given him for his birthday two years ago, though he was pretty sure that it was his son's, Asuma, idea; and moved it to reveal a small red button. Slowly, he brought his right hand over the button and gently pressed it down.

There was a few seconds of silence, but soon, a voice crackled through a hidden speaker.

"_Hai, Hokage-Sama?"_

"I need some tea prepared. Bring it to my office as soon as it is ready." Sarutobi ordered.

"_Hai."_

Five minutes later and there was a piping hot pot of tea in the middle of his desk, along with several small cups. Three minutes after that had been brought to his office; the door to the room began to open.

Sarutobi felt his eyes widen as he took in the young miko in front of him.

"Greetings, Hokage-Sama." The young girl greeted him as she fully entered the room, and bowed respectfully. Sarutobi returned the bow and greeted her kindly. As she sat down in one of the chairs in front of his desk, Sarutobi noticed that there were two armed men standing on either side of the door. One was bald and held a long pole arm, and the other was a raven haired man, with a handsome face and an odd…colored eyebrow. At the man's side, was a sheathed sword. "Those two are my guards." The young girl replied as she looked at Sarutobi's face.

"I see." Sarutobi nodded slowly. "Well…"

"Shion." The girl replied softly.

"Shion-Dono, would you or your guards care for some tea? It's fresh." Sarutobi looked at the two men, who shook their heads before his eyes went back to the young girl, who nodded slightly. After pouring the young blonde girl a cup of tea, Sarutobi poured himself a cup as well before sitting back in his chair.

"I thank you for coming all the way to Konohagakure to deal with this…situation, Shion-Dono." He said to the young girl, who shook her head slightly.

"I welcome it, actually." She replied. "It was rather boring back at the palace. I don't get to do very many exorcisms or cleansings, and a new kind of Oni to deal with is somewhat exciting."

'_She's definitely not an average child.'_ Sarutobi told himself as he listened to her speak. _'Than again, in Oni no Kuni, she's almost like a princess. She must have had a lot of tutors.'_

The two made small talk as they finished their tea. As they finished, he smiled slightly as the girl tried not to yawn. _'Then again, it is after ten and she is, after all, only nine years old.'_

"Why don't we continue with our conversation tomorrow?" he asked the girl, who looked almost angry at the notion. "That way, after we are done here, you can start cleansing the case of gum we've confiscated, before we escort you to Haruno Sakura, the young girl who bought it, and try to see if we can't get her to tell us how much she's chewed and where's she stashed it?" the angry look on the girl's face slowly gave way into a slow nod, accompanied by a yawn. "I've taken the liberty of setting you and your guards, up at the _Breezy Leaf Hotel_. Ebisu, the man who escorted you here, will take you to the hotel, okay?" the girl nodded before bowing and returning to her guards who both nodded appreciatively at him.

--  
The Next Morning  
--

Shion sat in front of the large oak desk with a small cup of tea in her hands. The Hokage, who she had decided last night, was a nice enough man, nice enough to be treated with respect; was not alone. Like her two body guards who stood behind her, their weapons in hand, there was a man who wore a white cat mask, standing right behind the Hokage.

"This is Tenzo, should there be more spirits than we expect, he can help in slowing them down." The old leader said. Something deep down inside of Shion almost snapped. Was this old man insinuating that she wasn't strong enough to deal with a small horde of demons?!

…of course…he didn't say that the man, Tenzo, would be able to get rid of them…only slow them down.

'_I wonder how he could be able to slow them down?'_ she thought idly. Outwardly, she nodded slowly. She took another minute to finish her tea, before she stood up and walked over to the case of gum sitting on the Hokage's desk. She closed her eyes before letting out a deep breath.

--

Shion was silent as she, her guards and Tenzo made their way to the girl's house, the one who had bought and chewed the gum. She walked behind Tenzo, but in front of her body guards. Both men; who had been protecting Shion for quite some time now, exchanged a few glances between themselves as they followed the young miko, they knew that there was something eating at the young girl. However, neither asked her what it was.

'…_How can it be? They sent reports of Gum Oni…and yet…that case was clean as the day it was made…'_ she stated mentally. _'If there are no spirits in the case, then where are they?'_

She really hoped that her lie earlier had been bought by everyone in the Hokage's office. If not…

'_I hope I can find some answers from this girl…'_

--

Shion stared at the pink haired girl in front of her, trying hard not to yell or scream at her. Next to her, Yumichika and Ikkaku were refraining from stabbing and slicing the girl.

'_We've been standing in her doorway for nearly ten minutes now.'_ The young miko told herself. _'Doesn't she have any manners?'_

"As a miko, are you allowed to fall in love and have kids?" the girl in front of Shion rambled. "Can you eat meat? I heard you weren't allowed to."

'_Yes I can eat meat, in fact, you should too, you pink colored toothpick!'_ Shion mentally growled. _'And allowed to have kids? Uh…DUH!'_ Did this idiot think before she spoke?

"How old are you, and why are your guards' creepy old men?"

'_CREEPY!?'_ Yumichika narrowed his eyes at the pink haired gil.

'_Old?'_ Ikkaku thought angrily, strengthening the grip on his pole arm.

"I thought miko's were accompanied by female guards? I mean, what would happen if these two old, perverted men decide to do something wrong or nasty to you? You would los-"

"_Yumichika _and_ Ikkaku_ have been my guards for years! They'd never do anything like that to me or anyone my age!" both men looked slightly shocked at the blonde's outburst but nodded sharply. "And another thing! I came here to ask you some very important questions, not so you could ask about stereotypes!"

"I would never ask about stereotypes!" the pink haired girl snapped back.

"A miko does NOT have to sleep in a temple. A miko is allowed to fall in love AND eat meat! Yes I CAN have kids, how do you think my mother had me? She didn't wish on a star one night for a daughter to carry one the family tradition of being a miko, and then _poof!_ I appear in a yellow basket made out of sunlight and handed over by a talking koi fish with a pipe in its mouth! She met my father, they did…things…and then nine months later, I was born! And _NO!_ Losing my virginity does not make me lose my powers!" Shion snarled. "Oh! And before you ask, mikos fart and burp just like everyone else!"

Shion took a few deep and calming breathes before she continued, while her two body guards tried not to laugh at the pink haired girl's shock expression.

"Now…the Hokage told me you like to chew the _'Miko Fresh'_ bubblegum, right?" Shion asked the pink haired girl, who was still shocked from the miko's outburst that she only nodded slightly. "He also said that you like to put chewed gum under desks and other things like that, right?" the pinkette nodded again. "Okay, first of all, gross; use the trashcan. Second of all, I need you to either tell me or show me where all besides the Academy you've stuck the gum wads."

"_EEW!"_ Sakura cried out. "Why do you want to know that?"

'_What to say, what to say?'_ Shion wondered. Luckily for her, Yumichika saved her.

"It seems that several packages of _'Miko Fresh'_ gum were exposed to vengeful spirits. They, once chewed and spat out, depending on if its dark enough, like under desks and the like; begin to create havoc. You wouldn't want to be the main cause of a large demonic infestation now would you?" the pink haired girl shook her head quickly, her eyes wide and fearful.

"Then spill, Pinky!" Ikkaku growled.

--

"Are you just as freaked out as I am?" Ikkaku asked as they, he, Yumichika and Shion stared at the pink monster in the closet. "I mean, never mind the fact that it's a mountain of possessed gum, but the fact that it's a sculpture of a boy's head in her closet made out of gum?" the other two nodded dumbly as the monstrous gum oni glared at them.

"Something is definitely not right with that girl…" Shion mumbled as she tried to tear her eyes away from the sculpture but failed to do so.

"Maybe you should see if she's possessed as well, Shion-Sama?" Yumichika asked.

"I think…I'll pass on that…" Shion said, shivering slightly.

--

She was a trained shinobi. She was a trained assassin… She had spent months, _no,_ years training he mind and body for things like this…and yet… Maybe it was because she knew the torturer? Maybe because there wasn't any pain involved? Or maybe, just maybe…it was because he was using a string?

Her sharp eyes darted back and forth as the white string wriggled back and forth across the floor in front of her. It was taking everything she had not to pounce on it.

'_At least I'm not-'_ Suddenly she felt her rear end, which somehow had gotten into the air, start to sway back and forth and her shoulders soon mimicked her rear end.

Yugito didn't know if it was because the Nibi or whether it was because she had been acting like a cat for so long, but for whatever reason, she just couldn't help but…

_Merrr-ooow!_

_SMACK-SMACK-SMACK-smacksmacksmacksmack!_

--

Naruto was bored.

He was happy that the Academy had been closed so some stuffy old miko or priest could go in and get rid of the pink, rock hard lumps of gum oni he had discovered while scrapping off gum from underneath he desks; but there was nothing to do around his house. If only he was allowed to take Kitty outside to play, then he wouldn't be so bored.

'_Although…Kitty doesn't want to play with me now…'_ it was true…a sad truth, but true nonetheless. Kitty hadn't wanted to even be in the same room as him since he had gotten her playing with the shoe string he had stolen from the shoe shop down the road last evening. _'She looked so happy playing with it too…'_ As soon as he started laughing at her for smacking the floor repeatedly where the string was, her eyes seemed to flash from black to purple for a second before she turned around and scampered off to hide. Naruto had made an effort into trying to find her…and he had found her…several times…but she either hissed at him or ran off. One time, she even knocked him down she had run by him so fast…

'_Maybe she doesn't like me anymore?'_ Naruto didn't want to think like that…but it was hard not to. He had never ever had a friend before…and Kitty had never run away from him or hiss violently at him and then knocked him over and then ran off…but…but now…

Glancing at the small electric clock on his bed stand, he sighed before getting up off his bed. It was 3:34pm, and even if the Academy was closed, the miko or priest or who ever had been sent for, had to have been allowed to get in.

'_Gah…I'm so bored'_ and nervous _'that I want to do homework…'_ a shiver ran down his back as the thought entered his mind.

--

Shion glared at her opponent's remains. The pink gum wad of evilness had been a worthy opponent, which was scary, considering since this one was at least forty times if not fifty times smaller than the large sculpture in the girl's room. Of course, the one in the closet didn't have too many places it could go and hide. The one she had just gotten rid off…she had chased it up AND down the classroom and finally nailed it when it was on the ceiling. Looking at its still smoking body, Shion suppressed a shudder.

'_The case of gum wasn't possessed…and I haven't found any spots that could be housing or creating the spirits yet…'_ Shion was getting worried. Was she a failure? She shook her head sharply at the thought. She was about to audibly berate herself, but before she could, the door to the classroom opened. Turning to look at the door and who had opened it, she found herself looking at not one of her bodyguards, Tenzo or even the Hokage. No, she found herself looking at a short, tan boy with short, spiky blonde hair. The boy was wearing a white shirt with a whirlpool design on it and black shorts.

The boy didn't seem to notice her at first, but before she could ask herself what kind of a ninja-in-training didn't look at his surroundings when they entered a room, she found the boy staring at her. _'…Wow…are those whiskers? And those eyes!'_ she thought to herself as she looked into his deep, ocean blue eyes. _'…I've never seen eyes like that before…'_ thankfully, she wasn't thinking about how good they looked…no, there was something behind them. _'It's…its like there's two different entities behind those eyes…Could he be-NO! If he was, he would have already done something! Besides…he looks nice.'_

"Who the hell are you?" the boy asked.

'…_Or maybe not…'_ "I am Shion, high priestess and head miko of Oni no Kuni!" she stated haughtily. "You can call me Shion-Sama!" the boy narrowed his gaze at her. "Who the hell are you?"

"Since when were mikos allowed to swear?" the boy asked.

"Since I said so!" Shion snapped back. "I've told you who I am, but you haven't. You're supposed to introduce yourself when you meet someone new. Didn't your parents ever teach you any manners?"

"It's kind of hard to teach people when you're dead." The boy growled. Shion had the decency to look slightly ashamed for asking the question.

"Sorry." Shion said softly. "But, if you could, your name?"

"Uzumaki Naruto…" the shorter blonde said slowly. "So…did you get 'em?"

"Get what?" Shion asked, trying to keep the oni a secret.

"The gum oni…"

"I don't know what you're are talking about." Shion lied.

"You don't have to lie about it…I was the one who found them in the first place." The spiky blonde stated with a scowl. And a shiver.

"I was told that the person who found them got a cut on their forehead…you don't have a cut mark." Shion asked.

"Oh that…yeah, it was gone the next morning. Scratches and cuts usually heal the next day…" Naruto said with a sheepish grin.

"Some kind of blood line limit or whatever they're called?" Shion asked, an eyebrow raised slightly.

"Don't think so…of course, it's not like I have any family to ask either…" Naruto said with a small shrug. Though he tried to pass it off as if it wasn't a big ordeal, Shion could see the conflict in his eyes. The two stared at each other for a few minutes before Naruto started to move towards his usual spot. Picking up his notebook, which had been left in the open, he turned around and started to move towards the door.

"Are you really a miko?" he asked, not turning around to look at her. "I mean, I thought mikos were supposed to be either old and ugly or teenagers with bows and arrows and what not."

"…Great…another one…" Shion mumbled. "Wait a minute! You read _Inuyasha_? I thought only girls read that…"

"Eh…I've read a few of them…Kagome is kind of bitchy but...meh." Naruto said with a shrug, turning to look at Shion. "I like Songo the most…she's like a kunoichi. I read _Ranma ½_ more than _Inuyasha_…I like the fighting styles…" the boy said with a grin.

"Never really got into that…and I don't like _Inuyasha_ that much anymore…too many stereotypes about mikos and what not." Shion stated.

"I wouldn't think that a miko would be able to read a manga about demons and stuff…kind of odd."

"Yeah, well…I can't just sit on my butt all day waiting for an oni to pop up. I have to do other stuff too…even if my mentors and tutors don't like it." Shion said with a small smile.

"I have a question…" Naruto started. "Why don't you have any guards with you? I mean, what would happen to you if like a hundred gum oni or homework oni pop out and attack you?"

"First of all, homework oni don't exist." Shion stated. "And second of all, my guards are outside the classroom…which reminds me…how did you get in?"

"Uh…through the door?"

"I know you came in through the door!" Shion said a little bit snappishly. "I meant, I told my guards not to let anyone in here while I was fighting the oni. They should have stopped you!"

"I didn't see anyone when I came in." Naruto said.

"You didn't see a tall, ugly bald man with a spear and a weird man with a multi-colored eyebrow?" Shion asked, half shocked by the boy's words.

"Nope…would have remembered if I had seen two weirdos like that…" Naruto said with a small nod.

'…_Ikkaku...Yumichika…Probably went off to get drunk!'_ Shion thought bitterly. "Um…listen…do you know how to get back to the Hokage Tower? I'm done cleansing the room and I kind of need to go talk to the old guy."

"Wow…I thought mikos were supposed to be polite and call everyone by their titles…"

"Kagome didn't, did she?" Shion asked.

"…Well, sometimes…but then again, she wasn't a real miko either…she was a kid from some make believe place called Japan." Naruto replied. Shion nodded slowly.

"But um…can you show me the way to the Tower?" she reminded him. Naruto thought about it for a moment and nodded.

"Yeah, I gotta go by there anyways…And maybe I can ask him about Kitty…" the last part was spoken softly and to himself. "Come on…I gotta get home so I can do this stuff…" _'What the hell am I saying?! I'm turning into Iruka-Baka-Sensei!'_

--

Iruka was currently sitting at a table at a local tea shop, talking to Inuzuka Hana and Mizuki. Iruka was bringing a cup of tea to his mouth when he sneezed and shivered at the same time. Unfortunately for him, doing both made him lose his motor controls for a brief second…and the cup of tea flew and landed on Hana's pants, while snot and spittle landed on Mizuki's face.

"I-RU-KAAAAAA!!!"

--

"You wish to speak to Yugito alone?" Sarutobi asked Yume, team leader of the Kumo-Trio.

"Mm." the blue haired woman nodded. "I know you don't want to hurt the kid's feelings, but if I know E-Sama, he'll demand Yugito to be released and returned to Kumo. And if Kirabi-Sama comes too…Yugito will go, no matter how strong her urge to stay with the boy is."

"Kirabi?" Sarutobi asked.

"Mm…" Yume nodded. "He's her sensei and father figure. He's also E-Sama's younger brother, and as such, he has almost the same power as E-Sama does…"

"But what if she doesn't want to go?" Sarutobi asked. The look on the blue haired woman's face was one of unbelieving, as if it would never happen. "Look, I have to prepare for the unexpected. If she doesn't want to leave, what will happen if this Kirabi comes?"

"…He'll get mad…" Yume said with a shrug. "And he'll proceed to put her in her place."

"Even if she uses…the uh…Nibi's power?"

"…Only E-Sama has ever beaten Kirabi-Sama…not even Yugito-San…" Sarutobi's eyes widened.

'_Is she hinting at what I think she's hinting at?' _"Alright…I'll arrange a time for you to speak with her…"

"Thank you, Hokage-Sama!" the young woman saluted.

* * *

Alright, much time has passed, some of you are probably pulling the ants from your pant legs and stomping on them…

Things haven't gone the way I had hoped during the last couple of weeks. I was looking at being homeless for a while…STILL cannot find work…the college I'm going to is F'd up completely…not going to tell you which one either.

Anyway, my laptop went loopy for a while, had to restore it AGAIN…didn't watch the Shippuden movie, for some reason, it doesn't want me to watch it…(sniff-sniff). Been playing WoW to pass the dreary days, stupid rain and cold…I'm fine with snow, but rain and cold? Stay away. Some idiot ninja'd Thrall today during _For the Alliance_ and so…kind of irritated.

I hope you had a fun time reading, and I hope some of you get the part with the head made of gum bit…it's from an old cartoon. I'd give you a cookie for it, but I'd eat it before it gets to the envelope lol.

Ja…

P.S.: I found out that I've been spelling Madara's name wrong…stupid website and scanners for putting the wrong name up in the first place…grr…they've fixed the name but I didn't catch it for a while…stupid me…grr.


	7. Chapter 6

Kitty

* * *

Yes, I indeed realize that I have updated this story twice in a row while the other two stories I am working on are left at a standstill. The reason is thus: I'm having a bit of trouble on how to start the fourth chapter of _Tenko-Sama_ at the moment. I am working on it slowly, and changing it almost every day; but I am working on it. _Heir of Uzu_ is coming around slowly, I have needed to think through several events in chapter three a great deal, so that is to blame for that. However, recently I was at my sister's house helping her out for three days. My muse for this story sort of hit me again when my sister's cat went ape shit crazy over a small pile of catnip…and then I got Final Fantasy 13…

* * *

Shion followed Naruto through the village as he led her back to the Hokage's Tower. They didn't speak to each other, though Shion would have liked some conversation. However, Naruto didn't seem to want to talk.

As they walked, she began to keep a look out for local pubs and bars, just in case she spotted her wayward guards. As she did, she noticed that a lot of people were glaring and making what must have been rude remarks about the boy who she was following. _'Wonder what he did to get so many of them angry…'_ she wondered. _'…There's no harm in asking, right?'_ she asked herself.

"Um, Naruto…" the boy in front of her turned his head slightly and looked at her.

"Yeah?" he asked.

"Why are all the people here glaring at you?" Shion asked, an eyebrow cocked in wonder.

"No clue." Naruto replied with a grunt. "Been like this since I could remember. Jiji says it's because my parents were outcasts…"

"And these people don't like outcasts?" Shion asked. _'Well that's a dumb question, Shion! There aren't a lot of people who DO like outcasts…'_

"These people don't like anything…" Naruto said with a frown. "They don't like me, they don't like people who talk to me…they don't even like to LAUGH!" he threw his arms up in the air for emphasis.

"How do you know that?" Shion asked. She had seen people laughing when the person, Tenzo, had taken her and her guards to the pink haired weirdo's house.

"I just do." Naruto said with a small nod. "If you don't laugh when you see an Inuzuka hound dog running through the streets wearing a diaper full of catnip with hundreds of cats chasing it; then there's something wrong!"

"…Why would a dog be wearing a diaper full of catnip in the first place?" Shion asked.

"…That's not important!" Naruto snapped. "What's important is that they don't like ANYTHING!"

"I thought you said that they didn't like you or anyone who talked to you?" Shion asked in confusion.

"Same thing…" Naruto muttered. There were a few moments of silence before Shion asked her next question.

"So…why do you need to talk to the Hokage?"

"I need to ask him a question about Kitty." Naruto stated.

"Kitty?" Shion asked. "You have a kitty?"

"Yep!" Naruto chirped with a smile…before it turned into a frown.

"What's wrong?" Shion asked.

"Me and Kitty was playing with a string today, and we was having a good time...but after she got the string…she hissed at me, knocked me over and ran off." Naruto said. "And every time I try to pet her or talk to her…she hisses at me and runs off. Jiji's old and junk, so he should know why Kitty is being weird."

"First of all, its _Kitty_ and _I_. Second of all, it's we _were_ playing and we _were_ having a good time." Shion corrected the boy, who shook his head from side to side in a 'Whatever' manner. "And maybe you're kitty…uh…what's her name?"

"Kitty." Naruto answered.

'_O…kay…'_ Shion told herself. "Maybe Kitty just wants to be left alone? Maybe that's why she's knocking you over and hissing at you?" The boy nodded slowly. "And for the record…how can you're cat knock you over?" _'Is it a lion?'_

"She runs into me and I fall down." Naruto said sadly. "But I don't understand!" he cried out. "We've played lots of games before and she's never hissed at me! She's scratched me once or twice, but never hissed at me!"

"Why'd she scratch you?" Shion asked.

"…Um…Jiji says I shouldn't say why." Shion frowned.

'_Why not?'_ she wondered. "Regardless of why she scratched you, cats are odd. You need to give them their space, or they're going to get angry at you."

"But she has lots of space!" Naruto stated. "She has the whole house! There are rooms I've never even _been_ in; that's how much space there is!"

"No, no, no, no…" Shion said with a shake of her head. Naruto looked at her and narrowed his blue eyes at her…to Shion…_'That's kind of creepy…'_ "What I meant by 'space', was that cats like to be left alone. If they want company, they will come to you. If you leave her alone long enough, she'll probably come back and maybe, just maybe, she'll play with you." Naruto nodded slowly and pursed his lips in thought.

'_I haven't tried that…'_ he told himself. _'Wow…she knows a lot about cats…'_ "You know a lot about cats."

"I like animals." She said with a shrug. "Their cute! Even skunks!" that part made Naruto blanch.

"…Seriously?" he asked.

"Well, if they've been de-scented or whatever it's called, they're kind of cute! Little black faces with little black eyes! And a fluffy black and white tail!" Shion seemed to melt away at the thought of a skunk who couldn't spray people with its stink juice. Naruto continued to look at her oddly.

"You're weird." Shion growled at the boy. "I thought you'd be like the other girls and like kitties, puppies and horses…but you like skunks…weird."

"I like horses too!" she snapped.

"_S-So there we were, right, in the middle of a toy factory and she goes and has a fit because she couldn't find a purple horse! So the manager calmed her down by telling her and us that if she calmed down, that he'd let her paint a horse of her choosing and let her keep it. Do you know what she named hers?"_

"_No, what?"_

"_Purple…Stupidest name for a horse I've ever heard! Toy or not!"_

"_Yes, but remember what she said when she asked you what you named yours?"_

"_Which one? The white one or the other one she made me paint and name?"_

"_The white one."_

"_Oh yeah…Since me and Yumichika here had to paint a toy horse, we had to name them too. I've never been good at picking out colors for…cute…toys. Yumichika here painted his red and yellow and called it _'Fireball'_."_

"_And what did you paint yours?"_

"_Well, like I said, I had to paint two. The first one I painted was white…"_

"_What did you name it?"_

"…_Glue…"_

"_HAHAHAHA! You named a horse GLUE! Toy horse or not! That's funny!"_

"_I thought so too…but Shion-Sama was NOT amused…"_

"_Yeah…smashed a paint can on my head for that…and then made me paint a new one."_

"_What did you paint it?"_

"_Green, yellow and a bit of orange and brown."_

"_Huh…odd colors…what'd you name it?"_

"_Ralph."_

"_Ralph?"_

"_Yes, Ralph. Shion-Sama was and still is a bit too young to know what Ralph means…"_

"_If you don't mind me asking, I've never heard of Ralph before…what does it mean?"_

"_Well, the word is from a language that people across the seas use. And Ralph means 'barf' or 'puke'."_

"_Let's just hope that Shion-Sama never finds out."_

"_Don't worry! She's probably still at the academy! She'll never find out!"_

"…" Naruto looked at the entirely trembling and blood red girl next to him and then at the people at the bar. _'A bald man…and man with an odd colored eyebrow…these must be her bodyguards…'_ Shion took a stomp-er-step, towards the men at the bar. _'They're in trouble!'_ Naruto smiled as the girl stomped over to the men.

"**IKKAKU! YUMICHIKA!"**

"Uh…oh…"

"Tenzo! You have to help us!"

"Uh…why?"

"She's gonna kill us, that's why!"

"But she's a miko…she wouldn't kill you…Beat you to a pulp, sure…but kill you? Nah…"

"_**DIE!"**_

_WHAM! SMASH! CRASH!_

"Wow…who knew mikos could do that?" the man called Tenzo stated as he watched the young miko beat her guards with a paper fan the size of his torso that she seemed to have pulled out of nowhere.

"She doesn't like stereotypes." Naruto stated. The Jinchuriki of Konohagakure and the only man who had the power to halt his bijuu enhanced state looked at each other for a few seconds before going back to the fight.

"I see…" _'I better warn Kakashi-Senpai…'_

--

"Hehehe."

"Hatake!"

"Yes?"

"What are you reading?"

"Uh…Not…Icha-Icha?"

"Oh really? Then why are you laughing like a pervert then?"

"I'm not laughing like a pervert!" _'Am I?'_

_No!_

'_Ah…thanks for clearing that up for me, Mini-Perverted-Kakashi-Who-Lives-in-My-Mind.'_

"Then what are you reading then?"

"…A manga…"

"What kind of manga?"

"An…adventure manga?"

"Oh really?"

"Really."

"Really?"

"Yes, really."

"…What's it called?"

"…_Inuyasha_..."

"…"

"What?"

"Lolicon." (1)

"Nani?"

"You're only reading that because there is a miko in town! Not only that, she's nine years old! You, Hatake Kakashi, are a lolicon!"

"Bu-But, really! I'm not!"

"I have my eye on you Hatake-San…"

"Yes Koharu-Sama…"

--

"I'm worried about Hatake Kakashi, Sarutobi-Dono." Koharu spoke to her old teammate and friend. Currently, she was sitting in her friend's office by herself. Usually when she spoke to the Hokage, Homura would also accompany her. However, he was busy taking care of a very serious issue. What that issue was, she didn't know, but if it was enough to make him skip out on visiting their old friend…then it must be serious.

"Oh?" Sarutobi hummed with a small smile.

"Yes. On my way here, I caught him reading."

"Yes Koharu, Kakashi usually reads wherever he goes. It's normal." Koharu wanted to smack her old friend for that…but she refrained from doing so.

"What I meant, Hokage-Sama, was I caught him reading…but it wasn't that smut that Jiraya-Chan writes." Sarutobi's eyebrows rose slightly. "At first I was happy! I thought to myself, 'Finally! No more perverted Kakashi! Maybe now he'll settle down and get married or at least plant some seeds!'…but upon closer examination…I found it to be a sign of something much worse. Much, much worse."

"And what, Koharu-Dono, would that be?" Sarutobi asked. _'There are, after all, few things that could be considered worse than Icha-Icha.'_

"A manga…"

"A manga?"

"Yes…but not just any manga…A manga about mikos." Sarutobi's mouth was silently moving but Koharu understood. "I know! The manga is called, _Inuyasha_. I've read a couple of chapters when I was visiting the academy sometime ago. There were a few girls in the class who at lunch time, would sit and read rather than go outside. I asked if I could read one and one of the girls nodded and lent it to me. Hokage-Sama…what Jiraya-Chan writes in his smut filled fire starters is for adults by adults that portrays adult situations WITH adults acting them out. That manga is about a young girl, maybe 16 at the OLDEST; being trapped in the past fighting demons with a half demon and some other odd party members. He was staring at her for minutes."

"I know that Naruto reads manga, and even _he_, a young boy with no parents who his still learning to _read_, can read a whole chapter within minutes. Hatake was staring at the same page, a page where the miko was on the ground with her…undergarments showing; for more than FIVE minutes! Kakashi is turning into a lolicon!" Sarutobi frowned.

"Koharu…while that disturbs me slightly, it is hardly worth looking into." The look on his old friend's face made him reconsider quickly. "At the moment. If he continues to read this _Inuyasha_ manga or any other manga with young girls in it; then I will have him checked out mentally."

"But!"

"For all we know, Koharu-Dono; Kakashi-San may have been bewildered at what things the younger generation liked. I have been trying to push him into taking on a Genin team for quite some time. Maybe he thought that he should know something that young girls like to read?"

"We don't see him studying about what young boys like to read, now do we?" Koharu snapped.

"No, but then again, Koharu; Kakashi was a boy himself. I know he doesn't like to remember it, but there was a time when he too thought bugs were awesome and so was playing in puddles of mud." Sarutobi said with a small smile.

"…Twelve year olds, Sarutobi, do NOT like to play in the mud. Not even boys!" Koharu said. Sarutobi blink-blinked and there was a second or two of silence. "They like to show off to girls and get in fights to prove who's tougher. Four year olds like your grandson, Konohamaru-Chan and eight year olds like Naruto like to play in the mud and look at bugs. Kakashi already knew how to get girls, even if he didn't know it."

"Koharu, I know that you're concerned, but Kakashi isn't a loli-" Sarutobi was interrupted by the opening of his office door.

"You two can't just barge in there! Hokage-Sama is in the middle of a very important meeting!"

"Shove off, you old hag!" Koharu turned to look at the person, the young person by the sound of the voice and sighed when she saw who it was. "Hi Jiji! Hi Baa-San!" Koharu glared at the blonde boy in front of her…before noticing the blonde girl next to him. Instantly, her frown was gone.

"Ah, Naruto-Kun! Shion-Dono!" Sarutobi greeted the two kids.

"Hokage-Sama!" the woman from the front desk started. "I'm sorry about the intrusion!"

"It's okay, Mio-San." Sarutobi replied. Turning to the two blondes, he smiled. "Now, what can I do for you two?"

"Well," Shion started slowly. "I came to tell you that the deed I was hired to do, is done." Sarutobi nodded and waved Mio, the woman from the front desk, away. As soon as the woman bowed and left, shutting the door as she did so, Sarutobi nodded for the girl to continue. "There were only a few gum oni in the classroom, and there were none in the classrooms surrounding it. As far as I can tell, there shouldn't be anymore."

"Shouldn't be?" Koharu asked.

"That's right." Shion nodded. "If there are anymore that make themselves known, just reply and I'll come back and take care of them, free of charge." Koharu raised an eyebrow for a second and considered the girls words. Looking at her old friend, they nodded before turning back to the girl.

"I see. Thank you." Sarutobi stated. "Now, Naruto; not that I don't mind seeing you, why are you here? I thought you'd be happy that you wouldn't have to go to school today?"

"I was happy." Naruto started. "But I think I did something to make Kitty mad at me. She won't play with me anymore and she's hissing at me a lot."

"I told him that he should leave her be." Shion stated. Sarutobi and Koharu looked at her oddly. Shion felt it…and tried to contain it…which she did…barely. "What? I know some stuff about cats." She stated.

"It's not that…" Koharu replied. "Its…er, nothing. Nevermind." Sarutobi nodded his agreement with his old friend. "But…why are you here together? And where are your bodyguards?"

"Those two weirdoes?" Naruto asked with a grin. "They got drunk at a bar and Shion-Chan beat them up!"

"You beat them up?" Sarutobi asked the now red faced girl who nodded stiffly. "Wh-how?"

"You should have seen it, Jiji!" Naruto exclaimed. "She beat them up with a paper fan!" the blonde haired girl twitched slightly.

"What about Tenzo?" Koharu asked. "I thought he was supposed to be with them?"

"I assigned him to show them to Haruno Sakura's house. After that, I ordered him to take the day off. He works too much." Sarutobi said with a shrug. "I thought that those two guards of yours would have done their job."

"So did I." Shion stated quietly. The four were silent…or relatively silent, with only a few snickers form Naruto that filled the room once or twice. After a few moments of the odd, almost silence, Sarutobi cleared his throat.

"Well, Naruto; I need to talk to Shion-Dono alone for a while, so I'm going to have to ask you to leave for a bit."

"But what about Kitty?" Naruto asked.

"Why don't you try giving her some space, like Shion-Dono said? You might find that it does wonders for…pets…just to be left alone for a while. I'm sure she'll be back to normal soon." Sarutobi said with a strained smile.

"Okay, Jiji…" Naruto said slowly.

"Oh! Naruto!" Naruto looked at Sarutobi slowly and cocked an eye. "Tomorrow, I've arranged for a special person to come and give you a special lesson, so be ready!"

"What kind of special lesson?" Naruto asked slowly.

"A kind of lesson that your classmates won't get." Sarutobi answered.

"REALLY?!" everyone in the room shuddered slightly at the volume of his outburst. "Is he going to teach me something really cool?!"

"You'll have to wait and find out."

"AWESOME! THANKS JIJI!" with that, Naruto ran out of the room.

"…A special lesson?" Shion wondered out loud.

"Yes." Sarutobi nodded.

"And the rest of the kids at the academy won't be mad that he's getting special lessons?" Shion asked.

"No." Sarutobi answered. "It's not really special actually…it's more or less a makeup day for him. He likes to skip class sometimes, so to make him attend the lesson; I have to make it appeal to him."

"And who, exactly is going to make chakra exercise more appealing to an eight year old, who has the attention span of a puppy?" Koharu asked. Her comment, though highly accurate, made Sarutobi glare at her and Shion snicker.

"Someone…who has been known to get results from her…unique…methods of teaching." Sarutobi stated.

"Kurenai?" Koharu asked.

"Kurenai, while a highly intelligent woman, wouldn't be able to interest Naruto in an exercise to manipulate his chakra for as long as needed. No…I have someone else in mind."

"Who else coul-" Koharu stopped mid sentence and glared at Sarutobi. "You've corrupted him. If he turns into a miniature masochist who also thinks that scaring little children is fun, then don't come crying to me!"

Shion…just stared.

'_Shinobi…are odd…'_

--

It was a hot evening as the group of five made their way into a small inn twenty four miles from Konohagakure.

"Let's get some things straight." One of them said. "We have not come to ally ourselves with Konohagakure. That being said, we did not come to start a war with them either. What our past Raikage did a few years ago was a stupid thing. It hindered our chances of getting our hands on the Hyuuga bloodline even more than they could have imagined."

"So, what are we doing here?" a younger, feminine voice spoke up.

"No doubt you have heard from your sensei, who has seemed to pick a fine time to wander off here somewhere…that Yugito has not returned home. Neither has her capture/return team. Currently, they are in Konohagakure under an armistice."

"Why?" a male's voice spoke up.

"Did your sensei not inform you of anything about this mission?"

"Nope. He said he would make some little kid cry, but that's about it. I thought he was rapping again."

"I told him to stop doing that…"

"It's a part of him." The female spoke up again. "It's like the noodles in ramen. Without it, it's nothing but soup. Without rapping, sensei is just another boring stick in the mud."

"A boring stick in the mud who could crush a mountain for fun…" a third voice spoke up.

"…Anyways…Yugito was found in Konohagakure. Normally that would be a problem, seeing as they didn't know who she was, other than the youngest and most dangerous assassin in the Elemental Continent at this point in time who is still loyal to their village."

"Itachi is scary…"

"So is Orochimaru…"

"Why can't the Leaf keep their best assassins?"

"…I don't know…but those two are scary as hell. If you ever meet them, what should you do?"

"Run away and then crap my pants!"

"…Gross and…no."

"Pretend to be dead! They'll get bored and leave me be?"

"Again…no…better than Mr. Crap-My-Self here though."

"…Henge into a chipmunk?"

"Wrong! Itachi can see through Henge, and it's a well known fact that Orochimaru eats chipmunks for dessert!"

"So…what do we do?"

"If you run into Itachi, give him a box of pocky. Kid is nuts for the junk."

"And if it's Orochimaru?"

"Hand him a potato and tell him it's a bird. He'll think it's some sort of special bird and he'll open it up and try to figure out how it did it."

"…And if we don't have any potatoes?"

"Then pray to Kami you never meet him…I heard he likes boys."

"Oh, so he'll let me go then if I ask him nicely?"

"…"

"He will…won't he?"

"There is a rumor…that he takes over their body with some sort of forbidden jutsu and seduces men with it for fun."

"Oh…my…Kami…"

"That's why in Kumo, for the last few decades, we have taught our shinobi too always carry around a potato with them just in case they ran into him…And let me guess…he didn't tell you that? Did he?"

"Nope…"

"Uh-uh…"

"He did say that we should carry around a bright red tomato…but no potatoes…"

"That idiot! Tomatoes are to ward off the Suna Jinchuriki!"

"So…anyways…back to Yugito-Sama?"

"Ah! Yes! Right! As I was saying, some little boy found Yugito while she was in one of her moods. He thinks she is a real cat."

"But…she looks nothing like a cat…"

"I know, but from what the letter says, the boy isn't too bright."

"So it should be easy to get her back, yes?"

"Wrong. From what the Hokage said, the boy has some sort of move or power that defeats everyone he's ever gone up against but one."

"What is it?"

"Hell if I know. That's why I'm here though…just in case the kids a jinchuriki."

"Yo Bro!"

"Hello, 'Bii."

"Sensei! Where were you?"

"Getting some kitty crack, just in case she don't want to come back! Yo!"

"That's why we have you, brother. She won't say no to you. You know that."

"Geez…way to kill the buzz."

"So…if she does come back…without the catnip…what are you going to do with it?"

"…Ever see a dog being chased by a horde of cats?"

"No…"

"'Bii…"

"Put a diaper on a dog, fill it with catnip and drop it in the middle of cat infested alley and BOOM! Instant entertainment! Hahaha!"

--

_Ein, ein, ein!_

"What is it Akamaru?"

_Rr-yap yap!_

"Really…that's one scary dream…good things it's just that…a dream…

* * *

(1): Koharu: She's old and isn't as up to date with the new meaning of words yet. So a twenty something Kakashi(known pervert from Konohagakure) staring at the image of a 15-16 yearold in her mind is like a man staring at a 8-13 yearold or however old a girl has to be to be considered a loli.

There you go…more stuff in the next chapter…yatta yatta yatta…

As you can tell, I didn't use anyone's name at the end other than Kirabii and Akamaru, and that is because I am tired as heck right now, seeing as it is 2am here. Hopefully it isn't too hard to follow.

What is Naruto's super move? You'll have to find out!

My other stories? I am working on them. Don't worry. _Tenko-Sama_ is in the middle of the chapter…had to scrap it a few times and rework it. _Heir of Uzu_ is somewhere in the middle of the next chapter…haven't worked on it much, but I've been waiting to use my punching bag, but its in the basement…and when it rains, it gets musty down there…and it stinks. So, I have had to wait since the day I got it, to use it. The punching bag is going to help me with _HoU_ so…

I do have another story in the works, right now, I have three chapters plotted out, and one of them is half way complete. So we'll see where it is next time I update. I still plan to be almost done with chapter 5 or 6 of _HoU_ before I post it so…

Stress is not a fun thing to work through(another reason why I have the punching bag) and neither is being bored and stressed. Still looking for work, hoping to get a job real soon…bills keep going up and up…funny, because I'm not doing anything with my credit card…stupid bank… So hopefully, when I get a job; stress will be lifted and I will be able to think more clearly.

Thanks for reading, I hope you had some laughs and…

Ja!


	8. Chapter 8

Kitty

* * *

Please don't tell me that my stories are confusing because FFNet decided to once again, get rid of the page breaks placed in the original copy before uploading it to FFNet so that we would HAVE to use theirs, because I know this... Stupid, I know, but what can I do? Not much.

Sorry to have made you all wait so long for an update, I have had to re-boot my laptop again because I guess Wednesday nights are the nights that Norton takes a break and allows viruses to come on in through the proverbial back door. So, I will not be writing on my laptop, but instead like before, on my mom's computer. Updates may be more sporadic or they might be quicker, depends on my day-to-day life I guess.

Disclaimer: Me no own Naruto…

* * *

Naruto stared down the stairs at the door to his house, waiting for the person that was supposed to teach him his super special lesson that no one else in his class knew about. He was bored. He had gotten up extra early just for this moment…Well, that and so he could try to find Kitty.

'_I left her alone all night last night, and still she doesn't want to play…'_ he thought as he sat down on the top step. _'She hasn't even eaten her breakfast.'_ Maybe that girl, that miko, Shion, didn't know what she was talking about? After all, she liked _skunks!_ No normal person liked skunks…

Little did the blonde boy know, the reason why his pet wasn't eating breakfast, was because she had found a room that hadn't looked like it had been opened in years.

'_I know the Hokage said not to…However, I am a kunoichi of Kumogakure, and Konohagakure and Kumogakure are not allies. Therefore…'_

The door Yugito had found, while staying away from the blonde boy she had up until yesterday called either 'Master' or 'Owner' or 'Kitten'; was a tall and wide heavy oak door with an ancient but still formidable cast iron pad lock that hooked around a thick iron eye; locking it shut from the rest of the building.

Since she had found it last afternoon, Yugito had been slowly and carefully working at picking the lock. She even went back to her 'corner', where she had placed her belongings so the young boy couldn't find; and dug out her old lock-picking tools. Unfortunately, the lock didn't seem to want to play fair with the tools…Either that, or the lock had been changed somehow internally.

'_Maybe a blood or chakra sensitive lock?'_ the slightly insane young woman asked herself as she crouched on the floor, trying to peek inside the lock. _'A house this secure, with all the genjutsu and traps keyed to none accustomed chakra signatures really wouldn't need such a tricky lock…If anyone did get inside the house, they'd be lost or killed.'_ Yes, when Naruto and the Hokage weren't around, Yugito had become curious about the building and slowly explored the building. She had found several deadly traps laid about, thankfully, she hadn't tripped any herself…Yet. _'The only foreseeable reason for such a lock would be to keep the boy out…But why?'_ The Hokage hadn't mentioned to her what the boy's parents had done to make so many enemies within their own village; maybe there was something about their past locked away inside? Whatever was in the room, Yugito wanted to find out.

oo00oo

Mitarashi Anko was not having the best of days. Currently it was 8:23am, or at least that's what it had been when she woke up to the sound of her seldom used alarm clocks…all four of them. Of course, she had forgotten to check the time after she grabbed a shower, made some coffee, drank the coffee and then slunk tiredly down to the local dango joint for a very odd breakfast of red bean paste dango. She also forgot to check the time after she left the dango joint too. Hopefully, the Gaki she was stuck training wouldn't bee too ticked off at her…Or else she'd have to tie him to a tree and throw kunai and shuriken at him, and hoping her morning aim wasn't any worse than her afternoon and evening aim was. Not that her aim was bad in the first place, but she really wasn't used to getting up early…

Making her way through the winding streets of the village she proclaimed her loyalty to, though sometimes she wondered why she had done so in the first place… _'This village is so single minded it's not funny anymore…'_ she thought to herself as she let out a yawn and sneered at a woman who turned her nose up at her as she walked by.

'_I was trained by a monster of a man who betrayed the village…So…that must mean I'm evil and just waiting to betray you all to him. Oh, let's forget the fact that he basically tried to kill me before he left. Then there's the Kyuubi Gaki…Short, hates or hated the people around him for treating him like dirt…And they hate him for little more than being a Jinchuriki…A Jinchuriki who if angered enough would probably go on a rampage just like the Shukaku's does. And then there are the Kurama clansmen. A good clan full of talent, slipping away due to bad choices of marriage. Some of the people here only see them as disgusting creeps who think they're too good to breed with the rest of us…Sounds an awful lot like the Hyuuga and the Uchiha…But those two clans were and are worshipped like gods amongst men.'_

Yes, nothing like a morning mental rant to get the day started.

oo00oo

_Smack-Smack-Smack_

_Smack-Smack-Smack_

_Smack-Smack-Smack_

_Smack-Smack-Smack_

Naruto, having moved from his previous location from atop the stairs, was now on the main floor, punching at a training dummy wearing a mask of a certain pink haired girl from his class.

Even after having the oni removed from the classroom, Naruto still couldn't forgive the girl for what she had done. He was scared, physically, mentally and emotionally. He would also never look at gum the same way he had before either. However, gum wasn't as fun to draw, so he stuck to drawing pictures of the pink haired girl instead.

Two things were on his mind at the moment. One, where the hell was the person who Jiji had said would teach him his super special lesson…And two, where and why was Kitty still avoiding him?

'_Maybe…I need to leave her alone for two days?'_ He asked himself as he jumped back from the training dummy and lashed out at it with a high kick to the torso area.

oo00oo

Yugito leaned back on the wall facing the old iron lock. For nearly four hours she had been working on it, well, four hours today anyway. She had tinkered with it for a while yesterday, but her head was jumbled with questions.

'_I wish Sensei was here…He would know what's going on with me.'_ She thought to herself. _'I know it's not the boy's fault…But damn it! It only happens when I'm around him! I have never pounced on a shoelace before coming here.'_ Nii Yugito, feared assassin of Kumogakure, one of the best and youngest NOT from Konohagakure; was not one to let worry eat away at her so…But when the worry was concentrated around her tenant, and her already wishy-washy control of her mind; she couldn't help but wonder and fear.

'_Until I can contact Sensei, I'll have to avoid playing with the Kitt-Boy as much as possible.'_

oo00oo

Anko wanted nothing more than to turn around and go back to her apartment and go back to sleep. Looking up at the dreary old building the kid lived in made her feel like she was going to enter the building, expecting to see a little Gaki ready for some remedial lessons; only to be knocked over the head, knocked out and waking up to find some creeper looking down on her almost naked chained up body.

'_Of course, no one lives here but the Gaki…So…I guess I don't have to fear any creepers popping up and knocking me out and waking me up before they do…creeper things to me…'_ There were many things Anko feared. Waking up one afternoon and finding herself strapped to a table with her chest bare for the entire world to see, and covered in black or purple markings as her old sensei smirked down at her holding a scalpel was one thing she was afraid of. Fear of being knocked out by a creeper was another thing. It wasn't a widely known thing, but Anko did not like BDSM…when she was the one being tied up. Of course, a creeper wouldn't mean just BDSM…it would mean a how other thing that would bring up a whole stack of other issues.

'_And that is why we don't eat ramen before bed…'_ Anko told herself as she took a deep breathe. Releasing the breathe, she took her right hand and balled it into a fist and slowly raised it to the door.

_BANGBANGBANGBANG!_

And then proceeded to knock loose splinters off of the old, battered door as she rammed her fist against it.

It didn't take long for the handle to start turning and the lock to start tumbling. The door opened, and from the darkness of the building, which from her angle, was full of training dummies and a large staircase, Anko could have sworn the two story building was actually much larger than it appeared on the outside. Suddenly, a small boy, with bright blonde hair and blue eyes looked up at her from his location half behind the door. Anko smiled at him…Might as well try to make nice with the boy for the few hours they were stuck together, right?

"You're late."

Her smiled vanished. With a lightning quick movement, her hand closed around the boy's collar and pulled him up and out of his doorway, and she stared directly into his slightly fearful and slightly angry blue eyes.

"I don't have to train you, if I don't want to, Gaki; so I'd suggest that you shut up and stop your glaring."

oo00oo

Yugito was still glaring at the old iron lock when Anko came to collect Naruto. Not that it would have really mattered if she was glaring at it or inside the room that it barred her entry from; she was on the seventh floor, and the front door was, of course, on the first. Even with her enhanced senses, she couldn't hear what had just happened.

'_It would be so much easier if I could just smash the stupid thing.'_ She thought to herself. _'But, that would be out of place, and the Sandaime Hokage is no fool. He'd be able to tell the difference even if the boy couldn't.'_ chakra could do some pretty amazing things, but it couldn't do everything. One thing it couldn't do was decrease the time it took for metals to rust at. Buying a new one would be almost suicidal…that was why she was working so long and hard to pick it open.

'_Thankfully, I think I got through the first two tumbles…'_ Most old pad locks such as the one she was working on, had three or four to work through. The newer ones had more. _'Unless the number of tumbles have been changed, I should be just about done…'_ getting two of the tumbles within minutes of each other gave a significant increase to her morale. Of course, that being said, the last tumble could sometimes be the hardest to move.

oo00oo

Sarutobi greeted Yume as the young woman left the hotel room she had been given for the duration of her stay. Seeing that the woman had a note in her hand, Sarutobi barely and briefly narrowed his eyes at it.

'_It could be anything.'_ He told himself as they turned and walked towards the stairs that led to the entrance/exit of the hotel. _'But it isn't just anything.'_ Sarutobi had seen such things in the past. Hell, he had written several himself. Why the woman wasn't hiding it from him as they walked…Well, it wasn't so much as a mystery as one would think. _'A subtle way of telling me that they won't be letting her stay…As if I needed a warning, I already knew this would end up this way. Not unless the Raikage has a weak spot for poor, lonely orphan boys…'_

"This was awfully fast, Hokage-Sama." Yume stated as they walked out of the hotel and entered onto the streets of Konohagakure's commercial district. "I thought that it would take a day or two more to find the time to get a chance for me to speak with Yugito."

"Well, to be honest, Yume-San, I thought so to. He had a bit of a problem a couple of days ago, but thankfully it was taken care of much more quickly than I could have imagined." Saurtobi explained, not wanting the woman to know about the oni infestation the Academy had endured.

"That's not what I meant, Hokage-Sama…" Yume said slowly. "I meant a time for me to talk to Yugito without the boy being there. The last time I saw him, he was practically attached to her…"

"Well, I think Yugito is beginning to feel a bit of stress from living with the boy and acting like a cat. Why she doesn't just come out and explain that she isn't a cat, is beyond me."

"Yugito…Yugito wasn't very well liked back in Kumo, Hokage-Sama." Yume started.

"No, I can't imagine that she was. Rarely are Jinchuriki liked by anyone who knows of their…special status." Sarutobi agreed.

"You've dealt with one before, Hokage-Sama?" Yume asked. Unless Kumo's information was wrong, Konohagakure never had a Jinchuriki before. Although…the attack the boy had that the Hokage had told her and her team upon their arrival... _'No…he doesn't act like Yugito did before Kirabi-Sama got a hold of her.'_

"Sunagakure has had several Jinchuriki before, Yume-San. I have fought with and against Suna more than a few times and I have seen the kind of stress and burdens they put upon their own Jinchuriki…Granted, the stress isn't what Yugito must have felt. I don't know why Yugito was chosen, but Suna always chooses the seal they place upon their Jinchuriki to be weak enough to ensure the Biju can take over without a moment's hesitation. Most people in Suna treat them as if the Jinchuriki would kill them for just looking at them…Wrong way or not." Sarutobi stated solemnly.

"Well, when she was younger, Yugito didn't have any friends. So, she made them up…imaginary. No one can take an imaginary friend away, or so she thought. One day someone came along and by the use of psychology, took her friend away. When she looks at the boy and how happy she's made him just by acting like a cat, if only because he thinks she is one; she's probably remembering herself at his age and what happened when that person came along and took her only friend away." Yume explained.

"But won't the same thing happen when the Raikage takes her back to Kumo?" Sarutobi asked.

"…Probably. Which is why I need to speak with her. She knows that he's coming…But she doesn't know when. Like I said before, I hope that we can soften the damage." Yume stated.

"…How? By making false promises?" Sarutobi asked crossly. Yume looked at him slightly startled. "You and I make false promises. Yugito makes false promises. The Raikage makes false promises. The majority of the world makes false promises…But to that young boy, a promise is just that…A promise. You make one with him and you break it…You'll kill a piece of him."

"B-But he's a student in the Academy! Shouldn't he know this by now? Shinobi are liars!" Yume exclaimed.

"Yes, yes he should…But he either doesn't or he doesn't think that it will either happen to him, or that he will one day do it to someone else." Sarutobi shook his head. "He is a hopeful boy…He has a heart of gold, slightly tarnished but still gold."

"Doesn't sound like he should be a shinobi." Yume huffed slightly.

"No…No, it doesn't." Sarutobi nodded. "If this world was just a bit kinder, if I was a bit stronger willed, I wouldn't have allowed him to enter…But…" Sarutobi trailed off as Naruto's house came into view. "Alas…I am only human." _'A weak one at that.'_

Looking from Sarutobi then towards the house Yugito was currently staying in, Yume thought over the old man's words.

'_I am a shinobi…'_ she told herself. _'…But, even if he is just an Academy student…He is still just a boy. A lonely boy...'_

oo00oo

_- Take them out -_

"Well, well, well…It seems it's finally time to make our move."

"Finally?"

"Mm."

"Good! I'm tired of sitting here day in and day out!"

'_Two birds with one stone…And no one will expect a thing…After all, tensions are still rather high from the Hyuuga-Kumo incident…No one will expect a thing...'_

* * *

Short chapter, I know…Don't hate me for it. Oh, I also added a bit of suspense…I know…I'm evil. (Ducks incoming soda bottles, tomatoes, snicker bars and shoes…)

Anko's training session with Naruto will be next, as will Yugito's talk with Yume and quite possibly the meeting between Sarutobi and E…and of course, Kirabi…and his sack of kitty crack.

Umm…_Heir of Uzu_ is still being worked on. Unfortunately a lot of plot bunnies have invaded my mind…and uh…Yeah...

To help deal with the plot bunnies, I have a challenge to issue unto you people…It's on my profile…Please, please, please send a message if you wish to take it…I will be wanting to read it.

Thanks for reading, remember you don't have to leave a review if you don't want to, I'm not a whore by any means…except for maybe a cookie whore…I do love them chocolate chip cookies…Mm-Mmm!

Ja!


	9. Chapter 9

Kitty

* * *

Anko sighed as she watched Naruto practice the chakra control exercise he had missed at the Academy. They had been sitting here, practicing for the last hour and the kid couldn't make the leaf float for more than a half minute. Every time she counted over thirty seconds, the leaves would either rip to shreds, shoot off in an unannounced direction, one of them had even sliced through the trunk of a tree!

'_This is getting us nowhere fast.'_ Anko thought to herself. Getting up and on her feet, she started to walk back and forth, her left arm under her breasts and her right arm under her chin, her right hand cupping her chin as she paced back and forth. _'Alright, the brat's a Jinchuuriki…Most Jinchuuriki have chakra coming out their ears. So…Maybe he can't do this? Maybe he has too much to keep in check? Okay, if I'm right, we'll have to figure something else out then. But what?'_

00oo00

'_If I never see a cast-iron padlock again, it will be too soon…'_ Yugito told herself as she worked on what she hoped to be the last tumble in the damned thing. _'I've only been working on this damned thing all morning!'_ Like most Jinchuuriki, Yugito had unknowingly gained a trait from her tenant. Her sensei had gained a bullheaded, and just as thick headed, attitude; while Yugito had gained what was probably the most dangerous and deadly trait that a kunoichi could have. Curiosity. Hers wasn't like what little kids had, hers was so compelling that it she didn't state it, it would cause her to go mildly crazy.

'_Come on…Come on…Come on…'_ She licked her lips as she moved the pick around. So far, she hadn't hit what she had come think believe were seals that contained small pockets of chakra, which would push the pick out of the lock and reset the tumbles like she had several times already.

_Chink!_

Yugito stopped moving the pick and looked up at the link, blinking as she did. Seeing the link finally hanging from the latch that kept the door shut with the help of the lock but not connected to the lock, she smiled happily. Sitting back on her butt, she wiped her brow and started to laugh, not loudly, but enough to fill the hallway. _'Finally!'_ she thought; _'I can find out what's in this damned room!'_

Standing up, Yugito stretched for a moment, popping her back as she did so, and then reached for the lock. Grabbing said lock and pulling it up and out of the latch, she quickly removed the latch and began to push on the door. It opened with a creak…It was dark inside, not that she expected it to be fully ablaze with lights, but darker than she thought it would be. Obviously there were no windows in the room, or if there were, they were covered by thick curtains. Taking a step forward, she began to enter the room…

"YUGITO!"

_KSSSH!_

Yugito shook her head and looked around, her heart racing and found herself stuck to the ceiling, her nails digging into the wood panels above her. _'Just freaking great!'_ she snapped at herself. Even in her subconscious, she was acting like a cat.

"YUGITO! WHERE ARE YOU?"

'…_Yume-San…What's she doing here?'_ Dropping to the floor, Yugito quickly swung the door to the room close and place the lock back on the latch, but didn't lock it. Bending down, Yugito picked up her lock pick and raced down the stairs to stash her tools.

00oo00

"…Is she here?" Yume asked herself aloud, looking up the long stair case from the first floor. The Hokage beside her shrugged.

"She should be." He stated. Yume turned to gaze at him.

"Should be?" she repeated. Hiruzen nodded.

"I've told Naruto several times that he can't take her for walks, and that she must remain indoors. So far, he hasn't broken my trust. I doubt he broke that trust today, especially since he's been excited about learning something new." Yume continued to stare at him.

"And how do you know he didn't bring her along with him?" Hiruzen looked at her and sighed.

"Because, the person who I have teaching Naruto would have brought both of them to me earlier." _'At least I hope so.'_ Anko had been known to take advantage of certain situations before. And…_ 'No!'_ he shook his head, turning around and looking around the training center/first floor. _'That was a onetime deal and it was for a mission! She said so herself!'_

Yume smirked slightly as the old Hokage looked around behind them. "…Ecchi…" the Hokage winced slightly at the remark, earning a snicker from the young woman. Turning around and looking at the stair case again, Yume decided to go looking for her countrywoman.

"Mm." the Hokage hummed. The Kumo kunoichi turned and looked at him. "I'll be going up with you." The woman sighed to herself softly.

"Don't trust me to behave?" she asked. The man smirked slightly but shook his head. Yume pouted cutely, but turned around and began the climb up the stairs.

It wasn't too long before the duo reached the third floor and Yume had finally had enough searching the rooms on the first two and stood at the bottom of the stairs leading up to the fourth floor and called up as loud as she could.

"YUGITO!"

…Nothing. Yume waited for a half a minute though, just in case Yugito had heard the call but was…indisposed. After a half a minute, she hollered again.

"YUGITO! WHERE ARE YOU?" It was faint, but she could hear the tell tale signs of feet scampering down the hallway on a floor higher than the fourth. She didn't know if the Hokage could hear it, but she could.

It didn't take too much longer for the scampering sound to become a slow and quite pace as the sounds of stairs creaking could be heard. Still looking up the stairs, she soon found herself looking at a slightly disheveled looking Yugito who wasn't too happy seeing either her or the Hokage.

"What?" She asked, making both Yume and Hiruzen raise an eyebrow. She didn't look too happy…and she didn't sound too happy either.

"Didn't the Hokage tell you?" Yume asked her fellow kunoichi. Said kunoichi raised an eyebrow and stared at the elderly man who had a thoughtful look on his face. Suddenly, the man's eyes lit up in recognition and began to slowly back away. Yugito took the chance to answer her fellow Kumo Nin.

"No. No he didn't." Yume turned to glare at the Hokage, but he had already ducked into one of the rooms behind them, slamming the door and locking it from the inside as he did. She sighed. Looking back up at her fellow Kumo Nin, she continued. "Anyway, I need to talk to you about…This."

"'This?'" Yugito repeated. "What do you mean?" Yume motioned for her to follow her back down stairs.

"This whole pretending to be a cat, thing." She began. "You know you're going to have stop it and just tell the boy that you're not a cat."

"I know." Yugito said. "I was planning on doing so soon. There have been…unforeseeable consequences to my actions…Many of them are still coming out." Yume looked at the Jinchuuriki carefully. "I…I…" Yugito began. "When the Kit-Boy plays with me, I get these urges…"

"Urges?" Yume asked. Yugito nodded.

"Yes. Urges." She repeated, nodding to herself. Taking a breath, she continued; "a couple of days ago, we were playing…" her voice trailed off as she and Yume made their way downstairs. If they had been wondering which door the Sandaime had hid himself behind, all they had to do was check for the door with the small puddle of blood seeping out from underneath it.

Yes…Hiruzen was very ecchi…

00oo00

Naruto looked down at his feet and then back to the purple haired woman he had just recently, like in the last ten minutes, deduced was insane. "You want me to do _what?"_ he asked her. Anko just sighed and walked towards him again.

"Fine…I'll explain it again…But only this once. Got it?" the purple haired woman asked the blonde boy, who nodded slowly. "Alright, you have too much chakra. As such, at the moment, you cannot and will not be able to do the leaf exercise." The boy looked down cast for a moment, but Anko's next words cheered him up slightly. "But that means you're technically stronger than everyone else in your age group. Hell, with better control over your chakra, my guess is that you'll be stronger than your Chuunin Sensei. However, that mean you're going to have to work even harder to keep it all under control. Walking on water is usually the third step in the chakra control exercise and it's the last exercise before the exercises that could blow parts of your body into hundreds of piles of flesh." Naruto's eyes widened in fear. "Plus, it's pretty damn sweet."

"Now, I'm going to show you how to do it, I'll give you pointers here and there; but you'll have to be able to stand on the surface of the water for more than a minute for me to even begin about teaching your anything else. Got it?" the blonde nodded. "Now…Actually, first of all…Do you know how to swim?" Naruto nodded and Anko smiled. "Okay, never mind about that then. First of all, we'll start on the edge of the river here. You'll want to start out in the water, so you may want to take your pants off to keep them from getting soaked."

"Okay." Naruto said with an eager nod. A few moments later, he was standing in the water wearing his sandals and his black shorts and white T-shirt. "Um…It feels really weird to be wearing my sandals in the water. Do you want me to take them off?" Anko thought about it for a moment. With a nod, she reached down and took off her own sandals and stood in the water next to Naruto, who was pulling his own sandals off.

"Alright, now you want to channel chakra into your feet. To do so, you need to concentrate and concentrate hard. Think about nothing else but channeling chakra into your legs and then into your feet. You'll feel a swelling sensation if you've done it right…After that, you want to…"

00oo00

"Ninety-nine bottles of milk on the wall! Ninety-nine bottles of milk! Take one down and pass it around, ninety-eight bottles of milk on the wall!"

"BII! SHUT UP!"

"Oh come on, Bro! Lighten up a bit will ya?"

"I will not! I have to maintain a cool head for the meeting with the Hokage later today! And with your annoying singing, I can't even breathe calmly!"

"…Party pooper…"

"What? What party? In case you haven't noticed, Bii, we've been walking for the last week! I hardly call that a party!"

"…"

"Thank Kami-Sama…Peace and quiet."

00oo00

"…I didn't do anything…" Kami said as she looked down at her newest praise mail.

"Why are you complaining?" A blonde haired, pale skinned boy asked Kami as she looked up at him. "It's free praise."

"You know what, Draco? You're right!" With a clap of her hands, the room, which had just been an office of grandeur, turned into a disco hall. "Dance with me Draco!"

"No." the blonde haired boy ground out. Kami narrowed her eyes at him.

"Don't make me get the riding crop out." Suddenly Draco was on the newly created dance floor doing seventies disco dances. "That's the spirit!" Kami cheered as she jumped behind him and mimicked his moves.

'_Why? WHY? WHY DID IT HAVE TO BE THIS WAY?'_ the blonde cried to himself through a fake smile.

"Because, Draco…You were bad." Kami said as she danced next to the blonde. "And going to hell would have been a nice reward for you, so instead, you came here…"

"I knew it…I knew you liked Mudbloods." Kami smacked him upside the head.

"Draco, I love everyone." She stated. "Killing another person for no _real_ reason was bad, but it wasn't the only reason why you came here. You killed a newborn kitten, and that means…for now and forever, you are my _**bitch."(1)**_

00oo00

"…Back when you were alive, you did something that just wasn't fly! Killing kittens is what made Kami pissed and now you stand there and cry, cuz now you're Kami's personal bitch!"

"Sensei?" Three fearful voices asked the rapping muscle mountain as he hopped, skipped and jumped along with his new rhyme.

"Yes?"

"…Where did that come from?" the three voices asked in unison.

"A voice in the back of my head."

"Bii."

"Yes, Onii-San?"

"Shut up."

"…Ninety-nine bottles of milk on the wall! Ninety-nine bottles of milk! Take one down and pass it around! Ninety-eight bottles of milk on the wall!"

"BII!"

00oo00

'_I…I'm doing it…I'm doing it!_' "Ne, ne! Anko-San! Look! I'm doing it!" Naruto shouted excitedly to his purple haired instructor, who had left him to practice the exercise after thirty minutes of him falling into the water again and again. Currently, she was lying on the ground, looking at a magazine, her back facing him. Lifting her head up, she looked over her shoulder and looked at him and smiled. Bringing a hand up, she gave him a thumbs up.

"Good job!" she said. "Now hold that for five minutes and I'll teach you something!"

"But you said you'd teach me something if I could do it for a minute!" Naruto shouted back. Anko shrugged.

"I'm busy! Besides, this way you'll be able to channel the proper amount of chakra better for the thing I want to teach you!" She looked back at her magazine. "Whoa! Kurenai-Chan! I didn't know you liked such things! Hmm…I'll have to test that later then…But first, I'll have to get more rope!"

00oo00

Kurenai shuddered as she walked down the street. Something foreboding was going to happen. _'Crap! My Ecchi-Anko-Senses are tingling! She must have found my interview in Kunoichi Monthly! Crap! I knew I should have kept that to myself! Curse you Saké!'_ With a fearful look now on her beautiful face, Kurenai ran off towards her apartment at break neck speed. _'Must find a safe place to hide!'_

00oo00

As Yugito wrapped up her tales, Yume didn't know what to say to the Jinchuuriki. She had been almost morbidly fascinated by the story where a simple shoe string had basically thrown her into a cat like state of mind. Not like what happened when she was extremely angry or injured, where she'd turn around and start slicing and dicing people to ribbons; but more or less like a common house cat.

She had also tried not to laugh when Yugito said that while on one hand she liked the boy, whom she still sometimes called either 'Kitten' or 'Master' for some unknown reason; had tried to get her to eat food not fit for consumption. Milk, raw fish, vegetables and vitamins. Who taught the kid on what to feed people, let alone cats? Yugito had stated that an old acquaintance of the Hokage had told the boy what to feed cats. Cat food, Yugito had muttered, would have been better than the stuff the boy had given her. Thankfully, the boy had…Shinobi-O's…lying around, and when he was gone, Yugito would eat a few handfuls.

From what the boy had done with her and to her, although unintentionally; she was surprised that Yugito wasn't using the litter box, like the boy had told the Hokage when he asked the man if he could keep Yugito as a pet. Yugito told her that she would kill herself before she sat or squatted over a box full of clay pellets and did her business.

"…You know, Yugito…" Yume began after thinking over all the things that he countrywoman told her. "E-Sama is coming here…To Konohagakure." Yugito's head snapped up and she stared into her eyes. "Um…" Yume paused before continuing, somewhat startled by the look Yugito was now giving her. "Kirabii-Sama and his team are also coming."

"They are?" Yugito asked. Yume nodded. "When?" Yume shrugged.

"Soon." The young woman began. "Actually, they should have been here by now." Yugito was antsy. Obviously she wanted to talk about her problems with her sensei, Kirabii.

**Omake:** Oh snap! It's a long one!

Maito Gai was a nice, if not borderline insane, man. He was loved by many, feared by even more and made kids of all ages avoid both the color green and spandex just by living in the same village. Maito Gai loved many things. He loved to train, mostly using his own freakishly insane regime that often left him tired by the end of the day. He loved to hang out with his friends, even if he both made them feel uncomfortable and embarrassed to be anywhere near him. Maito Gai also loved to help people out around the village. From helping little old ladies, to teaching a newly hatched baby bird how to not only fly but also defend its self from cats and other predators. How? No one knows…That's the magic of Maito Gai.

However, for all of his good points, Gai had some negative points, just as everyone does.

He hated seeing his friend and rival Hatake Kakashi read his smutty books everywhere he went. He also hated how his friend was always late. He didn't like how the village treated orphans and he didn't like it when his friends blew him off to go hang out where the 'cool' and 'hip' people hung out at. However…There was one more thing that Maito Gai hated…

Good for nothin' crazy people. You know, the kind that wander around city streets wearing cardboard signs on their person with stupid sayings like:

The End is Near!

Or

Aliens Are Real and They Live in my Nose!

Or

The Root of All Evil is…

Green Spandex!

Yes…These people were most un-youthful! Even more so than Kakashi's addiction to porn and his perpetual tardiness! Something had to be done about them!

'_So help me! If I see one more loony with a cardboard sign hanging over their shoulders, I'll-'_ Gai didn't have a chance to finish his line of thought as he turned the corner and saw yet another cardboard wearing loony running up to everybody and screaming at them…He was also shoving a cup in people's faces as well…Suddenly, the crazy man turned around and his eyes widened as he saw Gai. He ran towards him, shoving people out of the way as he ran towards the Jonin.

"You's got's ta help mah!" the crazy man screamed. "Da Dumsta' is haunted! It done spoke ta meh!"

Gai looked over the man with hidden contempt…he looked down at the man's chest…sign…thing…and read the message:

Hellp!

Da Dumster Just Talked to Me!

(Now dat you started reeding tis

you oh me 1000 Re-ooes!)

Something in the back of Gai's mind snapped as he read the message over and over again. His eyes twitched uncontrollably and his lower jaw started to fall.

'_Konohagakure! My beautiful home! Why? Why have you become full of crazy people? WHY? Kami-Sama! Tell me WHY? What should I do? WHAT SHOULD I DO?'_

00oo00

**(1.2)**Draco Malfoy, or, known to the rest of Kami-Sama's workers as Mr. Bitch, smirked as the new question landed on his mistress desk. Currently, Kami-Sama was using the loo, and she had given Draco a chance to do something good for the various worlds she looked after by letting him look after any new mail she received.

He had seen Kami-Sama do this loads of times. Well over seventy-five billion times, which was a very poor estimate of how many he had actually seen the woman deity respond to in fact. Grabbing her golden brush, which also turned into a pointer laser that shot out real lasers when the bottom was turned to the left, he took the question/message, and slowly began to write a response.

00oo00

Gai blinked several times as a new thought entered his mind. He looked down at the crazy man, who had taken the time to grab Gai's wallet, or trying to anyway, the man not finding any pockets on the man's spandex outfit; and grabbed the crazy man and lifted him high into the air.

"YoU wIlL pAy! YoU wIlL ALL PAY!" Gai hurled the man into the air and started to jump up and down where he had been standing. "SPANDEX, SPANDEX, SPANDEX!" There was a flash of green, and suddenly Gai was covered head to toe in green spandex. The crazy man, who had by now hit the ground, looked up and stared at the newly transformed Maito Gai in shock and morbid fascination. "I am…the Green SPANDEX! THE GREATEST VILLAIN TO EVER GRACE KONOHAKURE'S DOORSTEP! FEEL MY YOUTFUL WRATH!" with an outstretched arm and an closed fist, the newly named Green Spandex, grinned evilly and spoke: "TWANG!"

With speeds faster than a speeding rubber band, a fist made of spandex shot forth and nailed the crazy man in the face, sending him flying through the village.

People all around the new villain just watched in rapt anticipation for what the new villain was going to do next. They all gasped in horror as the new villain looked at a young boy, Rock Lee to be exact, and snapped over to him, using his new spandex-like powers to propel himself forward to him. Everyone else left, fearing what the insane man would do to them after he got done with the boy.

"…You look scarred little one…Are you afraid of me? Of the Green Spandex?" Lee nodded fearfully, and took a shambling step away from Gai. "I could help you…Offer you power, power beyond your wildest dreams…"

"W-W-Why?" Lee asked the crazy man. Said man just smiled a dazzling, shiny GREEN smile at the boy before answering.

"Because…Because…Because…" Lee waited on baited breathe for the man to answer him. "…Because…I FEEL LIKE IT! IS THAT OKAY WITH YOU?" the boy nodded, fearing what would happen to him if he said now. "Good. Now…" With an outstretched hand, Lee became covered in green spandex. For almost a minute, nothing else happened nor was anything else said. A bubble formed in the spandex and Gai smiled. "From this day forth, you shall be known as…The Green Spandex's Assistant! Fuzzy Brows!" the spandex snaked back towards Gai's body, revealing to the empty street Rock Lee, wearing a smaller spandex outfit, just like his mentor's with only one major difference. His green face was marred by two large, black, fuzzy eyebrows.

"Come…Brow Boy! We must flee before the police come!" Gai turned around and started to run off down the street. Lee was about to flee as well when a thought entered his mind.

"Green Spandex!" The taller villain stopped and turned back to his newly created minion. "There are no more police! They're all dead!"

"All but one, my minion! All but one!" Gai pointed to a tall building, gothic in style and completely out of the picture for a Japanese styled village; where a cloaked person stood on the building's roof top, starring down at them. "It's him! The protector of the crazy! Raven!" Lee gasped and looked up to where Gai was pointing, only to see the flap of a dark cape fluttering behind a corner of the odd building. "We will deal with him later, my minion. But first, you need to train! Your new powers have to be honed!"

"YOSH!" the boy shouted in glee. "AND IF I CAN NOT HONE THEM, THEN I WILL DO ONE THOUSAND PUSH UPS!"

"THAT'S THE STYLE FUZZY BROWS!" Gai shouted back.

00oo00

Time-Skip

00oo00

"Have you found out who they are yet, Raven?" Hiruzen asked the small boy dressed like a bird who stood in front of his desk. Said boy shook his head.

"Not yet, but I'm close." Hiruzen shook his head.

"That's what you've been saying for the last four years, Raven!" the Hokage slammed an open hand on his desk. The Raven didn't flinch at the sudden outburst. "And since he appeared, not only have our funny crazy people left in droves, all save for two, Maito Gai and his pupil Rock Lee; but two other villains have appeared as well! Need I remind you who snuck in to all of the stores in Konohagakure and stole all of the Ramen!"

"Yes…This Ramen Lord and his minion, Kitty…I've narrowed it down to two people. Teuchi and his daughter Ayame." Raven replied. Hiruzen just stared at the boy blankly. "What?"

"Why would they rob themselves? Or tie themselves up for that matter? Or, paint lipstick doodles on themselves? Especially the one with the spiky haired boy giving a 'peace' sign to the Chuunin who found them tied above a large tray of Dango?" Hiruzen asked the boy hero.

"To blame someone else, obviously." The hero stated in a matter-of-fact tone. "They are trying to rid themselves of the competition to stay afloat and by making it look like they themselves were victims, they look innocent in the public's eye."

"Uh huh…Well…" Hiruzen said with a sigh. "I think you should get back there and find these criminals." The Raven nodded and with a flash of smoke, he was…Still there. "Um…Raven…I can see you." The boy jumped in shock and threw another smoke bomb…When the smoke cleared… "Raven…I can still see you." The boy tossed down six smoke bombs, which filled the room, concealing himself from…Well…Everything else…Hiruzen heard the sounds of the boy stumbling around the room, bumping into furniture and then finally into the window…And he knew the boy had stumbled into it because the sound of glass breaking could be heard behind him. That…and the smoke was being sucked out of the room by the window's impromptu vacuum effect. "Finally."

00oo00

"FOR YOUTH!"

"FOR YOUTH!"

"FOR RAMEN!"

"FOR CATNIP!"

"Wha?"

"I mean…MEROOW!"

"FROM THIS DAY FORTH! WE FOUR VILLAINS WILL BE KNOWN AS…THE SUPER FRIENDS…OF EEEEVIIIIIIILLLLLL!"

_Oh how the people of Konohagakure shuddered as an ungodly amount of KI filled the place. Oddly enough, it also smelled like Miso ramen, sweat with a little bit of unbreakable sunset genjutsu and catnip as well._

"Hey, did you guys see how the Raven tried to sneak up on us last time?" a blonde haired boy asked the two spandex clad villains as they sat down to watch some TV.

"I know!" Cried Fuzzy Brows. "He totally used the same move he did the time before that and the time before that!"

"…He always gets behind people and growls at them…It's kind of creepy in a way." An older blonde haired woman stated, shocking all three males in the small room. "Um…I mean…Meow?" there was a collective sigh of relief as the three males dropped their heads towards the ground and shook them side to side.

"For a moment there, Ramen Lord-Dono…I thought your cat spoke to us." The taller of the two spandex clad villains remarked, earning a nod from the young Lord of Ramen.

"Aye…It does sound like that sometimes." The young blonde agreed. Taking his right hand, he scratched his pet's head and then her mid back, which earned him a deep sounding purr from the woman. "I think I need to eat something else besides ramen and Shinobi-O's. I'm starting to go insane!" The two green spandex villains narrowed their eyes at him. "I know, to save myself from such a fate, tomorrow, I shall eat…A CARROT!" The other two villains looked at each other before nodding and pumping their green fists into the air.

"IF YOU CAN'T EAT A CARROT, RAMEN LORD-DONO, THEN I, FUZZY BROWS, WILL EAT TWO CARROTS! ONE FOR ME AND ONE FOR YOU!"

"AND IF FUZZY BROWS CAN'T EAT TWO CARROTS, THEN I, THE GREEN SPANDEX, SHALL EAT THREE CARROTS!"

'_And if you can't eat three carrots, I'll…Scary…the eyebrows…EYEBROWS BAD FOR YUGITO!'_

_And so, the village of Konoha trembled in fear as the four villains prepared to strike out at them all from their hideout of…Hideoutkaban! Will the Raven save the village? Or will it burn in a sea of stupidity? Will Kami-Sama ever find out that I've been eating her twinkies? Find out next time on Super Friends…of EEEEVIIIIIIILLLLLL!_

"DRACO!"

"OH SHIT!"

End chapter

* * *

**(1) **& **(1.2)** I've been forgetting to do this for a while. I'll post a digit and then forget to post the meaning or explanation…Oops. Uh…Yes, the bubblegum head of Sasuke was paying homage to Hey Arnold! by the way. Anyway, that may or may not be the only reference to Harry Potter. But there won't be huge scenes. At least I don't plan on having any at this point in time. Mostly about certain Death Eaters and pricks getting what they deserve and Draco being Kami-Sama's bitch now and forever. Makes for some humor here and there when Hiruzen is trying to run from Orochimaru, please Jiraya's jutsu thirst and fleeing the wrath of Tsunade because he was drunk and tried to sleep with her that one time…Maybe next time, another scene of Orochimaur avenging his chicken nuggets? My no know…

Okay, so things have changed quite a bit. At least with me they have. So…here's a list! _**List no Jutsu!**_

1. I have found work. So far, I don't have too many hours, but I'm slowly getting more and more. I work as a closer at a fast food joint so I usually get home around 11:30-1am or later, depending the stores hours for that day or depending on the jobs needed to be done and when we get to them.

2. I am finding it rather difficult to continue writing this story seeing as it has no overlaying plot. I could go back and change a few things and make it a humor story down to its core, with no evil doers lying in wait. Or I could wrap this portion up and continue on. Seriousness for the next few chapters and then humorous till the end of the story. I haven't really decided at the moment. Plus…It's really hard to write Yugito when she's not acting like a cat.

It is hot and humid around here and it makes me not want to do anything that involves thinking. So…Updates will be slower…At least until it stops being so dang hot and humid. Once the temp drops a little, I think my brain will want to work on some things, like a new series of drabbles dealing with Naruto finding his own summoning contract and using the summons against Sasuke, Orochimaru, Kabuto and all the members of Akatsuki/Madara.

Anyway, hope you liked it. You will all find out what's inside that room next chapter and Naruto will finally learn something from Anko other than water walking! What? Who knows?(shrugs and reaches for an Oreo)…See you all later, gotta go get some milk. It's favorite cookie is lonely…

Death's Spear…


	10. Why do you accuse?

Why?

* * *

Okay, first off, this is not a chapter. It's a note. Yup, another one.

First and foremost, I am not actively working on _Kitty_ or _Tenko-Sama!_ at the moment. I have stated before that I have to feel like writing humorous stories to actually write a chapter. Unfortunately, some things have happened to me in my personal life and I don't really feel too happy. Happy Death's Spear = Humor stories/chapters. Not so happy Death's Spear = Darker, more down to earth, kill 'em in their sleep kind of stuff.

Second of all, and this is the big one…

Why do so many people think that I stole this story, or in the least, parts of this story from other authors? The worst I have ever done is try to write like another person, and that is mainly because I haven't really found my own style of writing. Not to mention the fact that writing styles tend to evolve with time.

Over the last few months, I have received more than a few PMs stating that I should come clean and reveal the fact that I 'steal' or 'take' parts of other people's stories for _Kitty_. The main thing that they point out is that I took parts of this story - _Azure Cat Crimson Fox_... That story wasn't posted on FFNet until after _Kitty_ was posted on FFNet.

The only part that I found after the first person warned me of _Azure Cat Crimson Fox CH. 5_, yeah that's right, _warned_ me was at the end of the chapter, is a TRIBUTE to _Kitty_. The author even says so at the end of the chapter. Please read the chapter fully before accusing me of doing something that I not only HATE, but despise!

Now, the last person who said this, I explained it to, but I thought I would explain it to EVERYONE, and hopefully, for the last time. The funniest thing about it all is that the first person to even tell me that such a thing existed, thought that _**Darth Malleus**_ stole that from me. He **didn't** but still, read the chapter before blowing your top at me. I don't know what other stories that I supposedly stole from, but Azure Cat Crimson Fox is the most widely mentioned one.

One of the reasons why I don't feel like writing the two humor stories, _Kitty_ and _Tenko-Sama!_ is this whole debacle. The other reasons, are like I said in my first point.

Anyway, _Kitty_ and _Tenko-Sama!_ are on hiatus for the time being, and I'm going to concentrate on _Acidic Properties_ and re-hatching some of the parts of _Heir of Uzu_. When I feel as if I can continue _Kitty_, you all will the first to know…Obviously.

Begging for updates is not going to change my mood, so I'd appreciate it if you didn't.

Peace.


	11. Chapter 11

Well…This is it. The long awaited end of Kitty.

I'm not discontinuing the story because of the lack of will to write it, though that is certainly one of the reasons why I haven't been able to continue.

1) Every time I start a chapter, it quickly unravels into a bowl of crap in my eyes.  
2) Nearly every time I get done with the chapter, something happens to my computer and I have to do stuff to it. Maybe it's a sign that I'm just not supposed to be continuing it in the way I have been? Maybe it's not and it's just rotten luck.  
3) I do not write humorous things unless I'm in a good mood…Which, sadly; I have not been in as of late. I found a job, but lost it because of car trouble…not that I wanted to work for such a childish manager in the first place.  
4) The story has no direction; which makes it incredibly hard to write chapters and content for.

Now…I am not done entirely with Kitty. I have for a long time now, wanted to re-do it; but get rid of some of the crap that has no place in it. However, like I said; for me to write humorous stories, I must first be in a good mood.

Also, my main inspiration for Kitty, which is and was my sister's crazy cat, is dying due to either a brain tumor or infection of the brain. Yeah. Didn't find out until about two weeks ago. That kind of puts a damper on the whole thought process.

Sorry for having to cancel the story; I know many of you liked it, however; as stated above, I'm not done with it. Not just yet.

-Isilithix


End file.
